I lost my dad a month ago. I wasnt expecting it - sadly, due to other family influences, my relationship with him had been strained for some time and i hadnt seen him - not my choice at all.
I wasnt inforned how ill he was. Managed to find out that he was in hospital but not told which one. The call i got to tell me that he had passed away was heartbreaking. If i had been told that he was deteriorating i would have travelled to be with him.
I feel so utterly heartbroken, empty, lost. There was no resolution of the reasons behind his sudden coldness to me, no ability to say goodbye.
I am not sleeping, crying a lot, feel overwhelming guilt though i am not sure why
I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about your dad. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support. In the meantime, you may wish to look at these Sue Ryder resources which might be helpful.
Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief