New here.

Just one week in and all I want to do is die. but I cant even do that as 4 teenagers need me. Everyone keeps telling me how strong I’ve been and I just want to scream. Theres a 6 month wait for counselling for THEM, nothing available for adults.

Hello Pippin,

Welcome to this community. I am so sorry to hear that you’re feeling this way. Your loss is so very new so it’s understandable - and not uncommon - that you feel this way. You’re not alone here and I’m sure many of our members will relate to what you’re experiencing.

It can be difficult to access counselling, unfortunately. Have you been in contact with Cruse Bereavement Care? I know they have a bit of a waiting list too, but there may be other ways they can support you and your family. Cruse also have an offshoot called Hope Again, which is aimed at teenagers and younger people, so may be useful for your children. Child Bereavement UK also offer support for younger people.

We offer free online bereavement counselling through this community, if you felt that format would be helpful. It’s all held over video chat so you can have your sessions from home. There’s more information about that here

I hope this helps and you get the support you need. Keep talking to us here - this whole community is here to support you through this difficult time.

Take care,
Eleanor

I know how you feel my husband past away on the 7th of august so fresh. I want to just go with him the pain is hard the tears roll, im angry why now he was 55 we have an 11 year old the pain she going through and i can stop it. Like u everyone says stay strong for her but i just want to scream at the photos of him to come home.

Thanks Eleanor. Unfortunately it is CRUSE with the 6 month waiting list round here. I’ll be asking the GP for some help for the children this week but, frankly, it’s not for me. Just like the other poster, my husband was only 55 and it was so unexpected. He died before we could get a diagnosis., after 6 days in hospital, half of that ventilated on ICU… but tell people it was cancer and they envisage a very different experience to what we went through.

Hello Pippin. I feel every bit of your pain. I lost my husband who was the most wonderful human being earlier this year and the grief is still overwhelming. Like you I have tried to get counselling but none available. It is so hard but please stay strong for your children. People keep telling me it does get less painful so we have to trust other people’s advice and experiences. You are not alone, cry if you need to that is normal. My thoughts are with you

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