I’m looking forward to putting the worst year of my life behind me but at the same time at least this year I still had him by my side for part of it. Where as when we hit next year I’ll never have that at all that year x
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Yes to think they won’t be a part of 2024 is a strange feeling. Life is unbelievable, it’s hard to comprehend they are no longer here, surreal but this year has taught me that there are still good moments and there’s a glimmer of a life still to be had.
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@Sah28 i can relate to what you mean this year has also been the worst year of my life, I lost my husband of 47 years in September.
I want to start the New Year positively but on the other hand I feel as though I’m leaving my husband behind ( if that makes sense)
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Hi @Sah28
Exactly how i feel.
2023 started so well both of us spending 3 months in Australia and Fiji till Feb. Then on holiday for his 63 birthday in April back in May. 1 month later 8th June gone suddenly no illness no notice nothing.
Then his friend and workmate in Dec gone suddenly heart attack. Then my mum had nasty fall resulting in hospital admitted she has dementia and has had to go to care home last week just before christmas.
Next year 2024 who knows whats ahead and without my husband around it wont be easy but i wont let it get me down .
Lynne Xx
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You must get some reassurance he would want you to be the best you can be . And for all that time together he will always be at your side . X
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Yes it’s a strange notion x
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It does make sense x
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I keep trying to look at it like a new chapter of my story x
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I felt the same after losing my hubby the first new year felt like i was leaving him behind but I’m realised as long as we love and remember them we are not leaving them behind they with us in our hearts always.
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Absolutely that’s what we all have to do . To honour the memory of the people we have loved for so long . To try and live as full a life as they would have wished for us . Bless you all x
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I know but try not to think of it like that … no matter what year we are in he can still stay in your heart 
and you will feel him there still x
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That’s so true
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Im.missing my baby today … must be cos stupid new year is coming ? I dunno when this will ever get better … ? Would like to just run away somewhere and hide and never come back ! A lovely thing happened though - my neighbours sent me some flowers to say thanks for being a lovely neighbour and to cheer me up ! There are some kind people in the world after all … i honestly give up hope sometimes ! My husband was such a kind man … i miss that every day - his kindness ;(
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Yes that’s all still to come all the ( happy new year bit ) as if have a merry Christmas wasn’t enough . Still nearly over 
. Yes I know it’s a cliche but wish you all a heart felt as happy as you can be new year . All the best for 24 X
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I’d love to hide away for the rest of my life but 3 kids still at home 22,19 and 11 so need to keep going. I’m finding it really hard too. But we all here for each other x
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i feel exactly the same just want to hide away forever, not have to leave the house and face the real world. i too have 3 kids home 19,16,9 and i know shaun would want me to try and be strong and happy with them but im finding it so so hard…
i feel worse about new year than xmas…mainly because we had so many plans together as a family and as a couple… just feel the new year will bring new heartache as many firsts to come 
xx
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Yeh that would be nice not to face the flipping world ! Im really struggling this xmas … last year i was just flipping numb because he had passed away a week before xmas ! I loved him so very much !! I wish he was here - he was so lovely 
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I completely understand it’s so hard to keep strong. But at the same time if I didn’t have the kids I don’t know where I’d be.
I’m finding it hard to plan nice things for the youngest. I have booked Disneyland we go on my hubby’s birthday so hopefully it will be easier to manage the day but facing the first year without him in it is unbelievable and unbearable to imagine x
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People say the first tend to be a blur it’s the 2nd time round it really hits (I hope not) x
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that’s beautiful your going to disneyland… that was shauns wish was for us to take our youngest to disney and he was determined to try and make it through just to do that, but unfortunately the cancer was so cruel and aggressive it was ripped from us…
it really is unbearable isn’t it? i naively thought no one else would understand how i feel but coming on here and seeing how so many other people are going through this is so heartbreaking xx
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