Newly widowed

I recently lost my lovely husband on March 15 th,worst day of my life,it was sudden he was 59 years old and I am 55,I have struggled each day to make any sense out of it,we had been married for 35 years.My 3 lovely daughters have been of great comfort and still are,but they all have their own lives to live and I feel I need to think of what to do next to carry on living,but I have no motivation,I can think of things I could do but doing them is another thing,I am lost and very sad inside,and although I have great support I feel very very lonely and just don’t know who I am or where I’m going,I am spiritual and do believe I will see my husband again when I pass,and I feel he is around me at times,but it may be years that I have to carry on without him,my heart goes out to all those who have lost a loved one,life can be so cruel.

Hi Robina
I could have written this myself except my husband died 18 months ago from cancer.
I understand the loneliness you feel as I feel it too, even when in a room full of people. It’s very hard to find yourself not part of a couple. My 3 children too have lives of their own and although they are very supportive i find weekends the hardest. The only way I have found to move on is by taking it a day at a time. I try to plan my day so that I have something to focus on and I’m not just sat at home every day feeling miserable. I volunteer two days a week and this has helped to focus me and build a routine. Also going out and walking, the sunshine helps me feel a bit better. Life is cruel and I’ve asked why is so many times but there never is an answer.

Robina, As I’ve said before your story mirrors mine. I’ve been crying all afternoon at the unfairness of what’s happened to me and my partner. We were just starting our first real year of retirement, no responsibilities, no money worries , finally our time to be together and enjoy what we’d worked for. 15 weeks ago tonight it was brutally snatched away. I’m devastated and life is not worth living now. I wish I could help you and all of us but life is just so cruel . Jx

Hi Alison
I’m so sorry you feel this way too,I agree I think getting through one day at a time is the way,now and again my mind races and I find myself thinking of the future which depresses me,best not too,I’ve had a bad day today,a bleak sad day,where I could not raise my mood at all,and nothing interests me,I’ve mainly sat too long thinking today,not good,some days are a little easier than others,hope things get a little easier for you too and we all find some peace from this.
Take carex

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