Micks names on some of the bills I also will leave that someone said to me it’s only his name your not erasing him but I am xx
I feel that too it’s soul destroying x 
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It’s true. The first thing my lawyer told me to do was update the house / buildings / car insurance companies, because insurance companies will look for any excuse not to pay out
I feel different… I don’t want to see any mail coming through with his name on it, because it is just another reminder 
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So sorry to hear about all the problems you are having with undertakers, probate etc. I had a terrible time with the undertakers. They showed me a lively wreath which they said would be size of coffin. As I wanted donations from friends for pancreatic cancer I thought the one long wreath would be fine. On day of funeral they had put a tiny cross on top of coffin which was nothing like the one I ordered. It upset me throughout the day. I made a complaint iand they refunded my money but no apology or anything. I felt like I had let my husband down. It was horrific. They also left the ulogy until the last minute but luckily I was able to do one myself. Please raise a complaint about the way you were treated because the undertaker you used was obviously thinking about profit and will do it ahain
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Sorry about typing errors.
Im so sorry for your loss it’s utterly heartbreaking and to add to that they didn’t have your choice of wreath which would be completely distressing you never let your husband down we do our best as we can Im pleased you complained hopefully it stops it happening to anyone else take care of yourself in my thoughts Adele x
Hello Stephj When my husband died recently I panicked about all the legal paperwork and didn’t know where to start. I was advised to ring the Bereavement Advice Centre 0800-634-9494. They patiently talked me through who to advise, what to get changed and any other details needed, complete with all the phone numbers. They also told me about a service called “Tell Us Once” where you fill in a few details and it lets all the authorities know in one go. (Local council, DVLA etc)They also said that as most of our finance was in joint names and I was the executor I didn’t need probate. It all went through very smoothly so I needn’t have panicked. Hope this helps anyone out there who is worried about these things.
Hi Steph. I know exactly how you feel. My husband died in June of a brain haemorrhage no warning . But i do have our children ( from previous marriages non together). so I have company and a reason to keep going. Saying that though I know what you are saying the loneliness and the need to have a conversation or physical contact. My husband like yours was my best friend we did everything together and I really miss him and feel very cheated. Regarding the paperwork I agree what a nightmare I am still waiting on probate and the life insurance company are being extremely unhelpful and thats upsetting too. I used to stay in bed among as I could so the day was shorter and I didn’t have to face the day. The kids being off didn’t help really either but now my 14 year old has gone to work , for the family business, so we get up with him.
You know you got this far and you are extremely strong you just don’t know it and its baby steps I have horrendous days and more horrendous days everything starts me off and I hate the world I hate everyone some times. I cut my hair off painted my house joined a pilates class yesterday just so I can do something myself. Have you a pet or anything? Keep talking you need to xxx
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My hubby died suddenly 2 yrs ago
I had a necklace made with some of his ashes
My daughter helped me decant some ashes and on a lighter note we ended up crying with laughter when I spilt some and the only thing I could do was hoover him up
I’m ver lost without him all aspects of my life have changed
He died 4 weeks before retirement
But there are lighter moments like this xx
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Hi so sorry for your loss all, I lost my husband end of June no warnings! He was only 50 & myself 45, my husband was full of life very sociable & loved by many! It has shocked the community! But I have all the same feelings as you all! My days/nights are horrific! I have lost my soul mate & best friend! No will as it was something we never discussed yet! So I am also sorting through paper work in this pandemic & my anxiety is through the roof!! Shouldn’t be doing this I keep saying to myself! But I am! & heart wrenching! He should be here! So many things remind me of him as we were joined at the hip! He was my everything & nothing means anything right now I hope the pain will ease & it’s all baby steps from here. Sending you all a hug as I know how you feel I am so sorry for you xx
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Your comments about hoovering up your husbands ashes Sue made me smile…brought back a memory for me too. I ordered mini urns and pieces of jewellry too for our children and I to always have their Dad/ my husband with us. The day started in a very sombre manner as I prepared myself to undertake this task …however I ended up crying with laughter at the thought of him watching me passing spoonfuls of his ashes through a tea strainer in order to fit said ashes in the tiny opening of a bracelet charm . Knowing him to be someone with the gift of finding humour in pretty much most things…helped me through a very sad task and you just reminded me of that so thank you
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Yes the necklace we were trying to fill had the tiniest of holes xxit was very funny
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