Not coping

Not coping well today, keep getting emotional, lucky it’s my day to work at home. Dad died 3 years ago and Mum died 3 weeks ago. Last week Mum’s funeral was on Tuesday & Wednesday was her birthday. I’m having trouble sleeping and wake up numerous times each night so feel exhausted all the time. Mum lived with me & I was her carer so I’m also having to get used to living alone for the first time. I’ve never felt so lonely before. Sorry to rant & feel sorry for myself, I don’t have anyone to talk to.

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@Victoria22

Sending a virtal hug. So sorry for you loss. I can empathise as I lost dad 3 weeks ago and mum in Nov 23. Just 9 weeks apart.

Its so raw at the moment. Just focus on hour by hour and day by day. Small actions are an achievement and no one expects you to snap back to normal. Whar you are experiancing are normal feeling for a loss.

Have you got support? You can reach out to me anytime if you want a chat or just to share how you are feeling.

Grief is just awful. I dunno how I will survive it as I cry everyday and hardly sleep. I’m hoping to learn to live with the hole in my heart.

Roberta x

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Also sending a virtual hug. Ranting and venting is what this space is for! I know the loneliness and the emptiness is horrendous. Some days it feels like it crushes me with its weight and I don’t know how to survive. I keep waking up at night too. You can always talk to us here. :heart:

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The waking up is the worse. Sometimes for a split second I forget and the weight of grief crushes me. Its so cruel.

Sending a hug. X

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It is. I hate the waking up. For a split second you don’t think about it and life almost feels normal and then boom, you remember. :confounded: Thanks for the hug and sending hugs back. :heart:

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I know how your feeling and it’s awful your not feeling sorry for yourself your human !
I’m the same break down mostly at bed time my mind runs riot
I do puzzle books to keep my mind active which help a little
I’ve been told the pain never goes away just learn to manage it our parents were a big part of our lives miss everything about my Mum , I try to remember Great times!
I wish you well

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Please dont feel you have to apologise for feeling sorry for yourself, if there was ever a time in your life that it’s perfectly okay to do that, it’s now :heart:

Living alone can be difficult at the best of times, I really feel for you having to do it this way, I’m sorry :disappointed: x

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Grief is so loney. Keep posting as we’re here for you.

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I would give anything for a full night’s sleep!! I’m gearing myself up to go back to the house tomorrow to check all ok. I find it so hard. I can still picture mum where I found her. The realisation that I’m never going to see her again standing in the kitchen making a cuppa or chatting in the sofa just kills me :cry:

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Good luck @Titch7674. I saw my dear father on the floor after he passed away. I couldn’t be in the house alone and kept looking at the spot.

When I’m there I still expect to see him in his chair or cutting veg for tea. It’s so hard.

Be kind to yourself tomorrow. Sending stength.

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If your primary care practice is anything like mine, then getting a fit note should be fairly easy - I’ve only ever rung and/or sent a message on PATCHS to request mine. I haven’t had to have a face-to-face appointment. You can be off for weeks or months, for as long as you feel like you need.

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Im so sorry for your loss. I am so scared of the future now that Dad is gone. We didn’t see this coming, and im terrified of how I’ll ever cope if Mum left too. I live with my mum now and she’s my rock, as I am hers, through this heart breaking time. My heart and thoughts are truly with you. You dont realise how strong you can be until you simply have no choice x

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Sending hugs

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Me too Titch myself and my Brothers are all struggling to sleep but then wake up numerous times exhausting !
I’m so glad I found this site because your advice is Amazing I’m so grateful x

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I feel that if I could get some sleep then my mind would be in a slightly better place to process. As well as the continuous ringing in my ears which I think is due to the horrendous head cold I had right after the funeral I get funny feelings like tingly across the toe half of my body and down my arms and hands. I think it’s anxiety. I was given Sertraline by the doc but only been taking them for two and a half weeks and I’m told it can take four to six to take effect. My brother is in Australia but I do have some fab friends and wonderful husband but I don’t think they truly understand the physical and motional turmoil I’m going through at the moment. :heart::cry:

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I found this picture that summed things up well.

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Unless others have been through it I don’t think they can really understand. My husband struggles to know what to do to sooth me. The heartbreak is so raw.

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Rob I’m so glad you shared this I now understand my symptoms x

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I found it helpful when I saw it. I want to post it at work so people understand grief better.

People forget its both physical and emotional symptoms.

Worth following Mark’s instagram page if you’re on insta.

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Good idea to post it at work. People who haven’t experienced it don’t realise how physical grief is and how it affects our whole body and mind. :+1:

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