It’s 6 months since my darling had to leave me and not one days gone by where I have had a good day. My days are long and lonely with just my thoughts and memories. This morning I was shouting WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME JIM . I feel so fed up today I don’t know if I can go on like this . Friends have all but deserted me think I should be over it by now they just don’t understand how it feels to loss your best friend and soulmate. We had no children so I have no one I can talk to I go weeks without having seen anyone apart from postman. This is no life I feel I’m just counting my days till I’m with jim again.
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Misprint, I am sorry that you feel so low and I know you have reach out on here often. It’s difficult at this time of year under normal conditions but at present between covid and the weather life seems pretty horrible and you are not alone with these feelings. If I remember rightly you have mobility problems and I think you are in contact with your healthcare people. Can I suggest you look into someone visiting you from a befriending scheme, there’s lots of different bodies doing this kind of thing and you could meet up and have a coffee. It just an idea but something you can think about and perhaps look into. Seeing people is so important. Take care. S xx
Hi Misprint,
Sorry to hear you’re having such a hard time just now. I know words are hollow but I am genuinely sad for you.
I understand what you mean about friends all but disappearing and honestly I need them more than ever since I lost my mum in December but I will not beg them and so fed up always making the first contact.
I also see where you are coming from as regards the never ending loneliness. I am off holiday next week for a holiday that had to be cancelled and am dreading it as probably won’t see a soul for days.
I could disappear and no one would notice nor care imo.
Anyway only reason I replied is because wanted to let you know you are not alone, your grief is still valid despite what others think and that hopefully this will become slightly more bearable x
Stay strong,
Suzanne x
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Hi misprint it’s hard isn’t it people don’t understand what such a terrible thing has happened to us and our lives are over, it seems there’s an expectation that we will get over this in time how can we ever you’ve lost your beloved Jim and I’ve lost my beloved Lee we will never know joy or laughter as freely as we did before, sharing a life together so precious and that’s what we have lost, I agree it gets worse as time goes on because there’s a realisation that this is it, it will never be better than now and that’s not being depressing it’s just how it is, everything I do brings a memory it’s all bittersweet, and i choose to be at home where my memories are of us together, we’re lucky to have known such deep love but our payment is a deeper level of grief but we’re not alone we’re all walking together sending hugs xx
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Thanks for your kind words Suzanne and MAB today as been really tough and to top it all my little dog Milo is not very well. I’m in bed now hoping for a better day tomorrow but I doubt it. Missing Jim so much its unbearable
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Sorry you are having such a bad day. This horrible weather is certainly not helping our mood. I don’t have words to make you feel better just want to wish you well and hope you manage to have a good nights sleep and have a better day tomorrow xx
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It’s such a painful process but we have to go through it when we’re grieving,I wish we didn’t .I know there are no easy answers or solutions.I’m trying to go out more.If you have mobility problems perhaps short distances are ok.Taking part in a befriending scheme is a good idea & checking out social activities in local community centres.It’s hard to do & sometimes we ‘need’to be alone but I think some external activity is good for our health & improves feelings of isolation.Hope you can take part in something when you are ready.
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