On line account headaches

My husband who died on 10th November used the internet for most things so a lot of what he signed up for was held only on line. On top of all the extreme emotion of his illness and death there are matters I have had to deal with, which as I am not a techie, are difficult and sometimes impenetrable. Thankfully I know or can guess his passwords but I didn’t know everything he signed up for on line until I get a message to say they have not been able to take a payment. Trying then to message them and cancel things is not easy and not transparent and never, ever, is there a phone number . In most cases I also have to use his email address which is obviously upsetting. All this while my brain is muddled and my his death is still so raw. Has anyone else experienced these problems?


I feel for you. I had exactly the same problem. My partner passed away on 18 Oct. She did everything on line banking, paying bills, on line accounts for this and that .I really had no clue where to start. Unlike me her brothers are well up with computers and they gave me a great deal of help but some things we didn’t know about and just dealt with them as the letters came saying she’d missed a payment. On the whole the companies were very sympathetic and between us it gradually got sorted but I do agree its not easy especially when you’re grieving. I was surprised how many places had bereavement departments, They’re the people to talk to if you can. Best wishes to you, I know, nothings easy at the moment.

I certainly did have the same problems as yourself. Fortunately my husband had left me a book of his passwords but I was also frustrated at not being able to speak to someone direct and explain the situation.
The worst was Paypal and they just didn’t get the message that he had passed away and they kept sending me emails telling me his card was out of date. It had in fact been destroyed a year earlier.
As I had no intention of using this service I wasn’t that bothered but they wanted me to send a Death Certificate to Luxembourg of all places. I refused and eventually they gave up.
It is so annoying at a time when we can do without this hassle.

Yes, I am grappling with Paypal and also eBay as he had items posted for auction which of course had bids registered against his account. Still not resolved it totally. My husband also paid for the lottery through an on-line account but after no activity of 12 months they automatically refunded the money back to the account he had used to pay initially which fortunately was our joint account.

My husband’s passwords were so random that we could not guess - he worked in IT so liked to make them totally unrelated to anything. Its when the organisations asked why I didn’t know them and remind them that their own policies are not to share that I got frustrated. He was also on Linkedin and I wanted to close down his profile before his birthday - they insisted on me providing a link to the obituary.

Because my husband died unexpectedly I had no access to any passwords. There was an account that I knew about that contained all his passwords but I didn’t know it was encrypted. It’s been a nightmare. Some companies are more helpful than others. But it is so wearing. I absolutely understand.