One Year

Dear All
I have today been to the crematorium as it was one year today that my husband,best friend and soulmate lost his very brave battle with Mesothelioma.
I am still in limbo I just cannot accept I will never see him, touch him speak to him again.
Life is so cruel
My grandson has just look at one of our wedding photos and said you looked as happy there as I remember you and Granfer before he died.
Be proud Granny not everyone has had that love for 50 years.
If only we could all go with our loved ones and not leave one behind

Love to you all
June E


I’m just about a year on, too, and trying for the feeling of being grateful for what we had. My husband was such a funny, kind, lovely man, never complaining about his illness, never saying ‘why me?’ and I try to think how lucky I was to have had our love for 47 years. But it’s hard to feel grateful when still feeling such a pain of grief.

It’s good to hear that you’ve got a caring grandson and, I hope, other family to support you. Take care. X

The first year is approaching for me this month, 12 months next week since Alan was taken into hospital and kept our home for the last time, only his ashes were to return. Trying to keep myself from falling apart as the 19th May approaches, and if today is anything to go by, I’m destined for a total mental breakdown. Yesterday was 11 months since his funeral, too many reminders of events that need no reminding. They are all firmly tattooed I’m my heart and mind.

So sorry to post in such a negative way, I’m kay on our bed, a million and one things to do, just recovered from my 3rd anxiety attack of the morning. Everything I touch is going wrong, nothing works, moved a bag of stuff to sort through, and in my frustration I kicked out at it, catching my toes against a hard heavy object which has caused bruising to two toes and increased my frustration tenfold.

Yesterday one if my front crowns fell out, my dentist is too busy so I’ve to see a new dentist he recently taken on, not happy about it, but can’t go around with one front tooth and a gaping hole right next to it. Just one more frustrating thing to cope with.

There’s no end to any if it is there? And through all the daily obstacles we have to endure, the first anniversary of the last time we were with our beloved husband/wife looms even larger. I’ve plans for Sunday 19th, shall visit the crematorium chapel then come home and spend the day quietly with Ada and open a bottle of the champagne he always bought for my birthday, anniversary and any other event we cared to celebrate. Doesn’t make it feel any easier but I’m hoping the day will pass with the same calmness as it did on the first wedding anniversary I spent without him. I shall always celebrate our wedding anniversaries and his birthday as we always did, he’s still here with me in spirit even though my most desired wish would be to have him here in the flesh, the same desired wish for everyone on here I have no doubt whatsoever.


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Pity we can’t edit our posts to correct suggested texts we have missed.

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