Hello, I started using this site after the death of my husband in February 2021. It really helped me.
I had taken early retirement when Ian died and after two years I got another part time job (I’m 65 now)
I moved to a lovely bungalow near my brother and his family in December (Ian and I had no children)
I’m working 3 days, sorting my bungalow out but I still have the most profound sense of loneliness lately. I have a constant empty “pain” in my stomach. It seems to be getting worse. I have good friends and family but feel as if I can’t always be telling them how I feel.
The emptiness is awful, I go for walks, shopping etc but then I come home to an empty home (apart from my gorgeous little cat) .
Don’t know if anyone else feels as bad as this after feeling not too bad for the last couple of years.
My husband died nearly 3 years ago and shortly after he died I l sold our home of 46 years and moved to be nearer to my 2 sons and families. I am still in turmoil as not only do i feel bereft about the loss of my husband I long for my old home and my neighbours and friends and the lovely area I lived in. I am only 6 miles away from my original area but my younger son persuaded me to move closer to them…i bitterly regret it and can’t seem to get over everything. So yes I understand your feelings because the void is always going to be there.
Thank you so much for your reply. I really love my new home, I don’t really miss where we used to live, but I do miss my husband and his companionship more than ever. I loved being part of a couple and miss that so much, although I have no interest whatsoever in changing my relationship status now
Janey, I am only 1 year down this rocky road. I am lucky, I live in a village where there are a lot of activities. Several book clubs, armature theatricals, Probus, Green fingers, Pick a Flick ( A film and a light lunch once a month ) Coffee club every Thursday, and the inevitable Bingo at the social club, to name just the ones that spring to mind straight away. Perhaps there are things going on where you are, helps to have social interaction and perhaps a few more friends to coffee with etc.
Thanks so much for your reply Rob. That’s the thing, I do have some lovely friends and I have things to do, it’s just that I never expected to feel like this after 4 years. A couple of years ago I didnt feel as bad as this.
Thanks though, I will try for more social interaction, it really does help.
I’m very sorry for your loss, it’s a big mountain to climb isnt it?!
@JaneyS i have been battling with the same feeling as it will be 3 years on the 9th july. When you bind your enternal soul to the one this is forever. Their death doesnt stop this, you find ways to pacify these feelings. Time makes it harder to talk to other people about these emotions, so you keep them to yourself. I have a phrase i calledl the mag pie theory. As everyone has a superstition about seeing alone magpie, we are now that lone magpie. For me i have a beautiful daughter and grandaughter, so i get all the love and cuddles i need, i just feel it is really a battle for those who have to put themselves back out in the world to get some conpanionship. Stay safe. Allen