Pain too much to bear

My wife died in my arms in a Hospice on Friday May 1st, 40 years to the day from when we first met. She had only been ill for a short time. I have studied several web sites and recognise all the descriptions of all the physical and emotional consequences that I am experiencing but right now the pain is too much to bear.

Hi I am so sorry for your loss and the unbearable pain you are suffering. You have come to the right place because everyone of us knows exactly what you are feeling at this moment so we all understand. It’s a devastating blow to your life and it is vital that you express your emotions. Grief has a tremendous impact on the physical body. Tears shed in trauma contain high levels of stress chemicals, let them out and don’t be afraid to break down. Take each day as it comes to you and let life dictate to you what you are ready for. Don’t rush. There is no quick fix I’m afraid and we all cope differently.
However it would be beneficial to you to look after yourself as in extreme emotional stress it is easy to forget your own health. Eat as healthily as possible which will help your immune system to cope. You help no one by allowing yourself to become ill.
You will slowly begin to cope with your loss I can assure you but you don’t want to hear this at the moment.

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I am so sorry, AlexSasha,
Grief really is a physical pain, we all know this , I cannot add anything to Pattidot’s post, she always expresses herself so beautifully,
You are very welcome on this forum where not one of us wants to be.
Life can be so heartbreaking.

Dear Sheila,
This is a beautiful post, thank you. :heart:

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Thank you for thinking of me. First day alone today. How it hurts.

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Nice to see you back Sheila, we have missed you. Hope you are well and behaving yourself :wink:

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Dear @AlexSasha Thank you for sharing this post I am extremely sorry to hear of the loss of your wife after a short illness. It must be so much to comprehend at this stage and still seem such a shock. I want to welcome you to this site on behalf of Sue Ryder, I hope that you will find some comfort here over this time knowing that you are not alone in your grief and this is a safe place for you to share your experiences and feelings amoung those who can have some true understanding. Take each day as it comes and one step at a a time, we are here to support you , please don’t hesitate to reach out if there is anything you need.


Thank you Ailie, I am experiencing a wide range of emotions minute by minute. I am finding that reading the posts is reassuring.

Hi sorry for you loss the pain is unbearable I lost my husband of 35 years together 7 weeks ago. Life is crap every one on here are in the same boat and talking helps x