Picking up life.

I’m finding picking up life after the restrictions really difficult. I felt safe during the lockdowns and restricted numbers meeting. It suited me, I could cry when I wanted, no one saw me. I could pretend I was fine. If anyone asked I’d say, “I’m ok”. But now it’s all open. ‘Our’ group of friends are six couples. We used to meet up, new year, Hogmanay, firework night, open air concerts, birthdays at restaurants. Now the events have all started again, just as they were before Steve died. All the same events that I used to go to in a couple and now it’s just me. I start to panic the week before, wishing I sent going. Two weeks ago I went to one of the couples houses where we had our own open air concert, singing, flag waving. Just like we always used to - and I just folded. The tears flowed and I went home, I just don’t know how to to cope with the tears and the terrible panic. I know they are being kind to continue to ask me but I just feel sick inside. I want to go but if just upsets me doing all the things we did as a couple. If I don’t go I have no other friends. I really hate my lonely life, there is such a big part of me missing.

1 Like

Ido don’t have any answers Montague, but I just wanted to let you know that I hear you. Take care of yourself and be gentle on yourself.

I’m divorced, which I guess is a kind of bereavement. I remember driving for nearly an hour to go to a 50th birthday party. I know the person whose birthday it was and her husband, but no one else. I felt so alone. Went to sit at a table and was told it was someone else’s place. So promptly turned round and left. It’s hard. Be gentle with yourself.

@Montague hi I am so very sorry for your loss its so hard without our soulmates I lost my partner pauline on the 14th April we didn’t really socialise so all we had was eachother it’s so lonely without her keep posting on here you will find support we all try to help eachother as best as we can I noticed you live in bromley I’m also in bromley I’m often around if you ever want to chat stay safe and take care sending hugs x

1 Like