Private messaging

Hello, I just wondered if anyone else is having problems with Private messages. I am not receiving emails when I receive a private message and only find out I have received some if I log into my account and go to my profile. I thought we received emails for every message that is sent to us either via forums or private messages.

Dear Sheila,

If you go to your profile, and click on Preferences, and then look at the section that says Email, for “Send me an email when someone messages me” it probably says “never”? If so, you could change it to “always” and then hopefully you will get an email?

Thank you Abdullah, never in a million years would I have found that information on my own.


Hi Sheila I have also had this problem but not all the time. Some messages seem to get through to me and I am informed but others have gone astray and I worry that it might seem as if I am ignoring people. I also check my profile on occasions just to make sure.

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Dear Pat,
This is the message Abdullah sent me to tell me what to do and it now works.
If you go to your profile, and click on Preferences, and then look at the section that says Email, for “Send me an email when someone messages me” it probably says “never”? If so, you could change it to “always” and then hopefully you will get an email?
I followed the instructions and found private messaging emails was turned off so I turned it on and it now works.
Why, when people are grieving, the website expects you to get your head around all these instructions beats me. A simple tick To receive messages and untick if you don’t want messages, there should not be a long list of boxes to click on.
Hope this helps.

Thanks Sheila and I have done that and it did say ‘never’ but I was getting emails most of the time, so not sure what was happening. I agree with you, why all this ‘going around the houses’ to find things. What you suggest makes perfect sense!!!. Not everybody is computer literate. I thought I was reasonable but I keep discovering new things on this forum.
Pat xx

Dear Pat,
I was receiving emails, in my spam box so I changed it to NOT spam, then I didn’t receive private messages at all and that is when Abdullah helped me out and I found Private messaging was turned off, goodness knows why because I didn’t turn it off and up until recently I WAS receiving private messages.
All I want is an email to tell me I have a forum message or a private message, no more no less, I do not have the patience to be ticking this and unticking that. That is why I never go on Facebook, too many boxes to tick or untick, drives me bonkers. I am not as patient as I used to be, even though I do have time on my hands, since Peter died I want my life to be simple and straight forward.

Couldn’t agree with you more Sheila. I do not want aggravation. I also have no idea why it said never when I was receiving notification some of the time. I don’t receive any notification that I have a forum message. I just have to find them for myself. Suppose I better take another look to see what else is switched off… Oh well…

There is a long list of boxes to tick or untick.


Hi Had to go back and put in ‘never’ after changing it I then received a whole long list of messages coming through in just minutes. Some of them nothing to do with me personally. So I have gone back to square one. My poor laptop will have a nervous breakdown.
Pat xxx

I know what you mean, box after box of tick this and tick that.

Help I am receiving all the messages on my e-mail now 17 so far and can’t seem to stop them.

Oh my goodness. I just get messages relating to myself so I wonder if you have clicked the box that says send me all messages instead of the box that says send me emails only relating to me.

I’ve been backwards and forwards clicking boxes as messages was coming thick and fast but I think I have stopped it now.

Hi Pat,
It should not be so confusing as this, we have enough to contend with without having to tick boxes. I found today that because I had cleared my browsing history I also cleared my saved passwords in error so had to log back in to the Sue Ryder website. I noticed that on their main front page there was nowhere to log in and you had to click on different boxes to find the online community, only then was there a log in box. Every website I have ever used always had the log in box on the front page. Whoever designed this new Sue Ryder website has made a real mess of it.

How I agree with you. It’s enough to put people off. I think they should scrap the lot and start again. I’m not pushing another button I dread what might happen and I think of myself as being reasonably computer literate, or I did…
What a performance you have had to go through. I agree, I used to work for the Local Council and our log in was on the very front page. I had three to negotiate but all straight forward.