I have been reading this forum from afar for some considerable time. I have only joined today because I felt the need to give an unbiased observation from an outsider, so this may be my one and only post. It is only since joining that I have realised how much more one can view being a member. I may choose to continue to observe from this better vantage point. Why now for my unbiased observation? Because I don’t much care for the way this forum is becoming. I have witnessed a change in tone and felt it my duty to speak out. I hope you will recognise me as a caring observer.
I am not newly bereaved as I lost my husband a few years ago but I am and always will be in the throes of deep grief.
In the past I have been touched by many posts on this forum and by the users, who have appeared to be the most caring of people in the midst of grief. Certain posts have gone above and beyond and I have made copies of their unique words. Might I take the liberty and mention a few of the users who have inspired me? Pattidot, SanW, Yorkshirelad, Jonathan123, Lonely, CW13, CrazyKate, Day at a time, Robina, Rainbow, TrishaF, bjane. That’s not to say others haven’t inspired but these names are taken from notes I have made over time. More recently PeterL has touched my heart. There have been some lovely conversations between those who have lost a child, parent, sibling, supporting each other. It is heartwarming to see and yet heartbreaking at the same time. I am humbled to have had the opportunity to follow many of you on this journey and to watch you grow into your grief, if that makes sense. Without even knowing it, you have all helped me and given so much. For that I thank you.
Now for the tricky bit but I feel it needs to be said. Of late and I really am sorry to say this but the forum has become noxious and possibly harmful to the newly bereaved and others, which I think defeats the object of Sue Ryder. It has made me sad to see this. I have no magic wand and I can appreciate that it must be very difficult for the Sue Ryder moderation team. I do not envy their task. I will say no more for fear that some may take umbrage at my remarks. I am not here to offend, I am an observer who wishes to point out one or two misgivings in the hope that they can be rectified. This forum is a special place. Please don’t spoil what you have. If I have offended please accept my apology.
My condolences to you all.