Really struggling without him

Very early days like myself 9 weeks ago my husband had bowel cancer felt ill for a month starting losing weight confirmed 3 days before he passed with a ruptured bowel the pain is unbearable we had been together 36 years I wish it would get easier xx Sorry for your loss

Dear Amsterdam,
I am so sorry to hear about your husband and understand the pain you are in. Even though you were expecting him to die from his illness it’s impossible to prepare for the reality and finality of losing someone you love. My husband died very suddenly and I have to admit that 7 months on the shock has not faded.
After he died I had some wonderful letters from former colleagues, neighbours and friends all without exception paying tribute to the lovely man with whom I had spent my life and hoped to grow old with. I did appreciate all that was said but in another way it just emphasised the enormity of what I had lost. It will be the same for you and your neighbours’ tributes. Heartfelt but heartbreaking.
It is such early days for you that you will not have registered what has happened.
This forum will offer you support from others who have suffered loss and genuinely understand grief in all its awfulness.
Take care

Thank you jobar. I know, it is such early days. I just hope that one day I can get through the day without crying. Such simple things can set me off Hopefully the forum will be a good support for me.

Thanks Kim5,
My husband had bowel cancer too. He was diagnosed last October. He suffered so much too with pain & sickness. It was only the last month that it was controlled. It is such early days for you too.