Return to work

I feel sick with anxiety about returning to work tomorrow. My partner died suddenly 8 weeks ago at the age of 44. Every emotion like everyone under the sun. I’m going back on a phased return and know it will be good for me with routine in the long run. I’m not worried about people mentioning or not mentioning to me about what happened but more that its another step towards normality. Nothing will ever be normal for me again, I’m just plodding on but still feel in my own world. Everyday I try to do a little bit to keep busy but get so angry at what he’s missing out on. I’m just numb at times, heartbroken

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Hi Jenn. I was so glad I had just retired when my Ron died.
I was a shop manager for a local charity and Ron often called in.to see me and to collect me from work. He used to help the charity with lots of things and he was always stood at my desk while I worked or he would help me with cashing up by writing all the amounts down on a piece of paper so I could transfer to the bank book.
I have been in the shop a few times since he passed and I can almost feel his presence there. I don’t think I could have faced going back there to work as I have too many memories but I think the work ethic is a good way to keep you going forward. I wish you luck.

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Hi, its sooo hard. I feel so cheated after finding happiness again after years of being on my own to cruelly be taken away in a heartbeat literally. My Jay collapsed in the street, instant heart attack. I’m so guilty as we rowed before that and wasn’t there to try and help. I work in the medical side of things so going through every scenario what I should’ve noticed etc. Nothing is going to bring him back, the emptiness is horrendous. I have good family and friend support but nothing comes close to him. I’m dreading being normal and doing normal things because inside I’m far from it. Day at a time, take care xx

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Hey @Jenn23 my darling husband died suddenly almost 12 years ago. I didn’t feel ready, but returned to work after 6 months. I found it just wasn’t for me anymore, it was a job I had previously loved but made no sense anymore. I left and took about 12 months off. Then I found a part time job, which was great at the time, because no one there had known my husband, if that makes sense? After that I changed jobs (4 years) and found something nearer home.
This was cut short however, due to a car accident. Around the same time I was diagnosed with severe Diabetes. So I was forced into early retirement. Tbh I was ready then. I was exhausted and needed a break after almost 40 years in tiring responsible jobs.
Please take it steady and gradually, you will still be in shock and may need to take time off again. Talk to your HR Dept and please put yourself first.

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Hi Jenn23,
I also returned to work this week, 4 weeks after losing my wife…
I feel your pain 100%. I like you, know in the long run it’s a must,
Mine was not a phased return…Although It has been, I’ve only made it through one whole day, and that was the first one, bigging it up as in had to be done,no matter how it felt…I was anxious, scared, sick to the bottom of my stomach, aching, tense, ahh…and still am every morning before I go in. I suck it up try to look myself in the eye and say it needs to be done for the greater good.
One day it will get easier…it must.
We are all here to carry each other on this journey.
Foggy

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Hi, I’m really taking it a day at a time, trying to look after myself, eating , sleeping etc, but there’s just a huge void there. Maybe it will get easier with time, really still early days. Look after yourself xx

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Hi, its so hard, I do shift work in medical sector so have to face sick and dying patients everyday. Everything and everywhere is a reminder. I’m hoping it gets easier with time, hard to see any light at the minute, take care xx

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