Saddnes

I feel so alone after she shock of losing my wife

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Hi sadnow sorry for the loss of your wife and finding yourself joining this forum. We are all at different stages of our journey . The journey that none of us wanted to be on.
If it helps tell us a bit about your wife. People say time heals well it didn’t for me I’m feeling the same now as i did when my husband died. Yes i go out shopping painting a smile on my face and telling everyone I’m ok little do they know inside I’m broken. Days come and go and i feel I’m getting further and further away from him. Sending you a hug :people_hugging: and just remember your beautiful wife and all the good times you both shared. Xx

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We had been married for almost 52 years we have 3 children over time we had many troublesome times which mentally hurt me
with her saying that she no longer loved me but for our children i forgave her on many occasions until i was so overcome that i attempted to take my own life because i was hurt so much.
But fortunately a close friend saved me and eventually we rebuilt our marriage we stil had good and bad times but at no time did i never love her dearly.
We had a family rift caused me to loose contact with my oldest daughter for over 10 years. Which really destroyed me when i found out that she had cancer my wife contacted her and they got back together but i had not the courage to meet her after all this time.
After suddenly my wife became ill and was hospitalised i found an old mobile number and called her we finally met at the hospital which is when we were told that it was a end of life situation that nothing could be done.
4 days later after a call from he surgeon it was too late i can not forgive myself for not being there. It was so sudden that i could not prepare myself i have always been the week sensitive person and feel so hurt and sad that dearly miss her so much.

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life is so full of many missed connections and tragedies. you don’t sound like a terrible person to me. I have myself done things I sit and regret to this day. I think in most lives, there are family disturbances more often than you think. I do not believe you are alone in your distress with your family. that is of little comfort but as least you know you are normal. best thing to do is forgive all and yourself and start a new day. the Power of Now helps me leave the past and focus on that minute in front of me to do the next right thing.

Yes i done that at the funeral with a single white rose and a letter that i had forgiven and that i loved her and sadly miss her.
But it is not easy when with so many memories i find ajusting to a single life after sharing it for so long i have never been a singles person it is the cruel loss that hurts so much

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