I have just lost my husband in January. I have had so many emotions that i don’t know how to handle. I miss him so much. We were spending all our times together, as we also worked together and now i am alone. It happened so suddenly. I am still hoping that i wake up from this nightmare and he will be in a kitchen drinking his morning,coffee or asking me if i have seen his glasses but I know he is gone and I don’t think I have fully accepted. Will it get better?

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Dear @Coping1

Welcome to the Community. I am so sorry for your loss.

Grief carries a rollercoaster of emotions and you are in the early stages of grief having lost your husband in January. It is still very raw for you and what you are going through is normal.

You can connect with members here who have been through the same experience as you under the topic Losing my husband/Losing my partner.

The Sue Ryder website here has useful bereavement information and support pages which will be of help to you including how to deal with bereavement emotions.

Have you considered booking an appointment with your GP to discuss how you feel and to see how they can support you?

Please continue to reach out here and take care of yourself.

Take Care.


Hi coping 1.

I lost my partner last year. For me I wouldn’t say it gets better but it does get a little easier. Quite recently I felt I’d started to move forward and had also started to come to terms with it but then a week or so later I woke one morning with an overwhelming sadness and my total grieving started again. I seemed to be back at the beginning again. That’s quite possibly just me as we all cope differently. Your loss is so recent but I hope you will eventually find your own way to cope. My best wishes to you. Peter.

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I’m 53, lost my husband 17 weeks ago to cancer after being told it was long Covid. Every vision, memory, in fact every aspect CD of my life reverts to my beloved husband. I can’t function other than getting dressed and taking our dog out. I have no interest in anything. All I can say is that the uncontrollable shaking has stopped ; still does appear but not as often . I feel as though I’m in a deep dark hole and there is no escape. They say you learn to adjust over time, I really can’t see this happening but who knows.
You take care x

Thank you for your response. It just been over eight weeks since my husband death. It is hard i get up to feed our dog who is 13 so he is just happy to walk around the garden and cuddle up. Everyone telling me just keep going maybe with time i do hope it will get better
You take care toox

Thank you. I am sorry for your loss. I Know it has been recent eight weeks since my husband death. Everyone keep telling me just get up and go like its the same as falling of the bicycle.
And I thought maybe somehow i was failing for not being together and strong as usual.
I guess it is ok to take time. Thank you

Hi Coping1. I’ve posted on here before how I think this grieving business is very strange. Since my partner passed away last Oct. I’ve been living here with her brother and his family because my house is empty and almost sold and I’m waiting for my new flat to be ready so I can move into it. I suppose I’m luckier than some as I’m surrounded by people who support and care about me. Its been an odd day today, one of many lately, I don’t drive much now so when we go anywhere my brother in law drives. Before she passed away we were often out in his car sitting in the back together. This time of year she would always wear these leopard print gloves and I would hold her hand so now when I’m out in his car sitting in the back ,now by myself of course ,I imagine I’m holding her hand and I can feel those gloves. Sorry I’ve started to ramble a bit now its just that I miss her so much I’m sure like all of us good days and not so good days. I realise from reading posts on here that many people are already living by themselves perhaps I’m lucky that I haven’t been but very soon I will be and I think as that day gets closer I’m starting to worry how well I’ll cope. I’m so sorry for your loss.

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Hi I lost my Husband and whole world 3 weeks ago to cancer. He only got diagnosed 2 weeks before. It’s all been such a shock and like you dont know how to begin living without him. Everything I do reminds me of things we shared and did together, little routines, plans we made dreams we had. We had no children together, my family are amazing but they cant stop this unbearable pain and loneliness. People say it will get better in time but at the moment I can’t see how. Take care xx

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Hi Nikki

It’s an awful shock to find out your husband has cancer, especially losing them so shortly after. My husband was fit and operable but having been delayed in diagnosis for 5 months, the tumour suddenly spread before treatment was given. I’m so angry that he never got the chance to fight and passed 3 weeks after being told he was palliative. A total of less than 3 months after diagnosis but 8 months from first going to the doctors.
I am so lost and lonely without him, I can’t see a future without him, everything is him( thoughts, actions, eating, sleeping - well what little I get, literally my life or should I say existence). You and I are both young to lose our husbands , this is the time we should be enjoying our lives together, plans taken away from us, gone far too soon. I find I’m crucified when I see couples together, I put my head down as if I am a second class citizen and shouldn’t be there, it’s so painful.
You take care x

Hi Sharon,
I’m so sorry for your loss too :broken_heart: It really was a shock, it all happened so quickly but losing someone to cancer or for any reason is unbearable and nothing seems to take the pain away. I’ve tried to keep busy today and the suns been out which was nice. But now it’s dark and I’m sat alone again with rubbish on TV that I’m not really watching. I still think he will be coming back and I can tell him everything ive been doing but obviously that’s never going to happen. Like you everyone around me seems to be in happy couples which I feel bitter about. I know I have to carry on but I honestly cant see any point.