So alone

Did not think it would be so achingly hard to be left alone oin the house after my husband died everything is so pointless ’ I struggle all day long - trying to motivate myself to even eat. How does one carry on when everything you lived for has been so cruelly taken away for ever


Hi Lonely - so kind of you to reply!Yes there are no easy answers- but life goes on - and we have to make that effort to join it again and try and find happiness whilst never forgetting our partners - they would hate to see us so sad. Its hard though - you just want everything to back to the normal before they died. I’m going on a walk in the sunshine now perhaps that will put a smile back on my face at least for an hour or so!!


@Honeypie . lm 6months in, lost & alone in this house. lm in the throes of a meltdown as l type, sobbing and calling for my husband, have been crying what seems forever today. l cant understand the intensity of this grief. l sincerely hope you fare better than me as time passes.


Hi @Honeypie, & @Lotswife,
Sorry to hear you are struggling so badly with your grief.
On days when I feel super sad, I listen to a special song, it’s called Turbulence by Bowling for soup, they’re an American band, I picked this song & we played it as the walkout music at the end of my mom’s funeral. In the chorus he sings: “& we’re all just passengers tonight, & we’re all just traveling through our lives, we will reach our destination, so just hang on for the ride, say a prayer & close your eyes, it’s just a little turbulence,” I always found this very appropriate because when the person we love passes, “we are just passengers”, there is nothing we can do but"hang on for the ride," & we are usually so shell shocked by it all, we end up on autopilot, just going through the motions with everything, but he’s saying, keep going & you’ll come through it.


My partner died last year on the 27th July well that’s when I found him :sob: it’s so hard :weary: I wish I could have been there for him in the end… but he made it hard… :pensive:


Good afternoon all.
My husband died from liver cancer I’m May this year.He was diagnosed on March 25th this year.7 weeks from start to finish.I am writing things down as I need to complain about his treatment.The doctor said the mass was small and slow growing,there was no need for treatment yet and they would send an appointment for an MRI scan within 4 weeks to see how things were going.
The pain of losing him is unbearable and actually feels like physical pain.All the people that gave me the line “If there is anything I can do for you, don’t hesitate to ask” Have buggered off.No visits from anyone ,only our daughter and grandchildren.Not many though as they have their own lives to live.I haven’t seen them for 3 weeks.I text them .If I didn’t I wouldn’t get anything.I have to have my will signed by two people.I have tried ,but to no avail.How do I get it signed ? One couple this morning said no,they wouldn’t sign anything legal.My last hope was a couple of friends ,I left messages ,but a week later no replies.I emailed them both,no replies.
I have mobility issues,I can’t drive,I can’t afford taxis,I can’t get financial help from DWP.Why are sending treated like we are something horrid ?
None of us wanted to be a widow.
Sorry if I sound as if I am feeling sorry for myself,but this is now my life.The awful loneliness,feeling invisible,knowing no-one really cares how I am coping.
Love and respect to all xx


@Abrokenlass67 .

This has been me for 6 months. Even today l know is going to end badly, early to bed to cry my tears.
Sorry !!


@Abrokenlass67 I know what you mean about people saying “if you need anything…” Then disappearing, when the funeral is over, basically we’re just left to get on with it, :pensive::woman_facepalming:t2:. I started going to a social group run by mind, I have made some new friends there, & we do different activities & things.
My dad has a new girlfriend, she’s a very nice lady, but my sister & I feel very much abandoned by him. When he used to go up to his allotment, he used to pop into my sister’s house for coffee & a chat, (his allotment is literally 10 minutes walk from her house,) but now he doesn’t even visit, she is struggling badly to cope with everything, & I would say, on the verge of a breakdown, I’m concerned for how this is going to work out.

@Honeypie . Today l feel my lonlieness even more so, it is our wedding anniversary, 52 years. l remember the day so well. And now just tears and heartache.


Just wanted to say that’s exactly how I feel, I totally understand where you’re coming from though I don’t have any answers for you I’m sorry. Feeling so totally alone :disappointed:

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