So hard without mum

My mum passed away last year, but am still struggling. From the moment I open my eyes in the morning my stomach is in knots. I miss her all the time.
Thought about counselling but just can’t face it.
I am finding it harder to be around people more and more. Think people at work just think I am grumpy, as everyone thinks that after 16 months I should be over it.
I don’t think my husband even cares anymore, I was watching something the other week on telly, and someone died on telly, and I completely broke down and sobbed and my husband did nothing, just sat there. I asked him about it and he said he didn’t know what to do, am beginning to think he doesn’t care at all. Just feel so alone.

Hi Jasmine

I was just like you for 2 years after I lost my mum. Didn’t want to socialise or even see people. Felt miserable all the time.
Even now, nearly 3 and a half years on I struggle at times but things definitely started to get better about a year ago.
I don’t think people realise just how long it takes to start enjoying life again. Slowly I started wanting to see friends and do things. My work was affected as well.
I’m still not the same person I once was but I’ve learned to accept that im not going to be. Your husband probably just doesn’t know what to say for the best.
I did 6 sessions of counselling but hated it. For me it has simply been time and coming to terms with the loss in my own way.


Hello Cheryl, sorry that you lost your mum too. I know that it will just take time, I just miss her so much.
Sometimes when I,m on my own just can’t stop crying.
Mum used to love the autumn, she loved the colour of the leaves turning red and orange. She always said how beautiful it was. Evertime I walk through the leaves I feel sad, because another year has passed without her.
I hope that you are OK, take care

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Thanks Jasmine.

I feel the loss of my mum from the moment I wake up till I go to bed. Just like you.

My mum brought my daughter up with me and I thought she would see her into her twenties or even thirties. Instead my daughter was just 12 when my mum died suddenly and unexpectedly.

I don’t believe that we will start missing them less but it certainly becomes less raw. I’m expecting to feel this way for the rest of my life and I sort of came to terms with it.

I try not to talk about my mum anymore around my partner and daughter because I get upset and they don’t know how to handle it at all. Maybe you could talk to your husband about how you feel? Or like me, you will probably just give up. I know they miss her like I do.

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