To be honest I don’t really know what type, or what I need to say or how this is gonna help?
I lost my Mum just over 3 weeks ago, altho she had been diagnosed with cancer the diagnosis & her death all came about within a 6 week period so very quick & the medical staff weren’t honest with us about how quickly this was going to happen. She was only 58.
Right now I want to talk but have no words. I want to cry but can’t cry.
I’m ‘getting on’ with life i.e I’m getting out of bed and feeding my little boy & doing what I need too but I’m dead feeling inside.
I honestly am blessed (before this especially) & have a lovely life with a good close knit family, husband & little boy but just feel so blank and empty right now.
Life won’t be the same for any of us without Mum.
People say I have to keep my mum ‘alive’ by talking about her but I don’t want to talk about her I want her here.
I feel like I’m dreading life without her I’m only young & have a long life ahead of me to be ‘dreading it’ it’s horrible. Will this feeling shift eventually? I know it’s only very very early days. The whole ‘grief’ process frightens me, I’m just very frightened to live life without her.
Although we’re a very close family it’s hard to support each other as we’re all grieving at the moment.
My Dad is so broken. We all are.