Hi, all i havnt posted in awhile. My husband died just over 3 years ago of Bladder cancer i was his main carer it was jolly hard work but we worked though it together. with the help of my son, when he wasnt working. After he died i was put on antidipresants. (Citalopram) , felt it was not working after 6 months so came of. But now. i know this is going to sound strange. but i see my husband at night he comes to me. its happened about 6 times now. ive even told him to go away and that im ok. Maybe he know im not ok. Only just last we i had an anxiety attack . I was cry uncontrollably my son came over didnt know what to do with me so called 999. they calmed me down. i was calling out for my husband, we had know each other for over 45 years married for neally 30. did everything together. ive had brerevment counceling , Mental heath, so much counceling i live along, feel like ive lost so many friends, its a lonley life, i have joined local groups, trying to make new freinds but it so hard. sometimes you just wamt to talk. My doctor has now put me back on citalopram… really think its a waste of time. Any one can give me some advise, or ina smiular situation,

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I’m in a similar situation Gilly. I was married for 20 years. My husband had a cardiac arrest in front of me and died a month later. I take Sertraline but still have anxiety. I go out with my sister but want to get home before I’ve left the house. It as though life is happening around me sometimes and I don’t want to join in. I feel better when I get home. I don’t think Christmas coming helps. I will be 60 in February. The only thing I feel comfortable doing is going to yoga which is 100 yards up the road. If you need to talk I’m here. Sending hugs x

Thank you Nel, for your reply. I sometimes get ready to go out. Then last minute can’t go. I hate coming home to an empty house. Sorry for your loss. It’s helpful hearing your thoughts xx