I found a proper bereavement counsellor very helpful in the early stages as I had no family locally and there were so many times I felt as if I was on the edge of a break down. She always maintained it was perfectly normal which I found comforting. She allowed me to talk about exactly how I was feeling and she helped me plan how to get through the anniversaries etc. She also got me to verbalise exactly what I’d lost in my life. I found this very helpful and now often think of things she said that made sense. Now what I want is like minded people to share experiences with…this group is doing that online but also I’d like a support group which is face to face contact…that needs to be cruse I think.
I don’t think you can ever get over it but I think and hope you learn to live with the sadness and memories without the constant tears and in my case no longer finding it necessary to avoid many situations that I know are going to hurt a lot. Though maybe the avoidance will always be there and you just find other things to do and people to be with. Who knows, it’s an uphill journey for sure and not one I wanted ever but certainly not at only 63 with probably many years of my life left to fill.
Good luck and warm wishes to you