As some will know I lost my partner in November. Is it only me that is struggling to cope with the mornings, as soon as I wake I have a gnawing sensation in my stomach & a terrible feeling about me. Even if I get ready quickly to go out the amount of time it takes is hell, finding them extremely hard!
Yes you’re not alone. I lost Martin in August and the first couple of months it would take me an hour to just get dressed. Then i started work again and i had to get quicker at puting my pants on .
At first i had that punch of shock every morning as I woke and faced it all again. Now its not so much of a shock. Its always there. I guess its just become part of my reality. I usually start crying half way through my shower but I think thats probably ok.
It takes me ages to get out of the house though. I end up checking and rechecking things, saying goodbye to his photo, checking I have my glasses, what have I forgotten? There is just always that feeling I’m missing something.
And that something is Martin. So much part of everything its hard to stop it being. And so I talk to him through it all and ask him to come with me. That sounds daft i know.
Sorry thats a very long winded way to say, you’re not alone.
Sending you love xxx
Hi. I lost my partner in November.
I find mornings hard too, to the extent i cough and wretch quite a few times, sometimes i bring up bile and then it passes. Ive been prescribed mild antidepressants to deal with the anxiety and take the “edge off”, they’ve helped abit, but i still have that nauseous, sinking feeling in my gut.
@cath2 Yes the doctor has prescribed me medication for anxiety & I try to take them as quickly as possible in the morning but they still don’t help & they won’t give me a repeat prescription so I have to keep asking & going back for them which isn’t helping the situation at all.
I just wish this strange odd feeling & pain would go away but I know it can’t because my partners never coming back & that’s what’s causing it. Don’t like this new life!
I’ve got OCD as well @Stillhiswife & my partner always used to do the checking up for me so know where you’re coming from there!
Thoughts are with you both
I totally understand. We all hate this new life none of us asked for or want.
Yesterday i felt almost calm and accepting, but today felt nervous and short of breath. Its a freaking sh!££y rollercoaster of emotions! But i think we are all stronger than we give ourselves credit for - its 7.30pm another day gotten through!
Sending thoughts and love X