The weekends are always so hard but I am in so much pain, led there this morning, the anxiety kicking in, heart racing, mind in overdrive. I was exhausted before even getting out of bed. My little girl has swimming lessons 9:30 on a Sunday and I just can’t do it today.
I kept dreaming shaun was back last night then waking and realising it was just a dream. I just can’t do this I really can’t
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Morning, you CAN do this and you will do this I promise. The reason you will do it as you are an amazing mum and you’ll do it for your daughter. That’s what we do as mums.
I’ve no doubt I’ll have days like you too and I expect you to turn round and say the same. 
The situation we have been dealt is utter shit but we have little choice but to keep going for our kids xxxx
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Morning @Nori the mornings are so so hard, the weekends harder…
I will be here anytime you need because I know the pain your going through, although shauns battle was very quick so we didn’t even have time to process what was happening, so I can’t imagine in some aspects what your going through 
I’ve had such a bad weekend, it’s really knocked me, I’m so tired and drained mentally/emotionally…
Fearing the future so much and I try so hard to not think ahead but it’s impossible…
Sending you lots of love 
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Stay strong, you can do it!
Take your daughter to the swimming pool it will help you…i know it’s hard, just take step-by-step…i know it’s hard but our children need us…
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You can and you will as you don’t have a choice. Your daughter only has you and as big a responsibility as that is, that is your reality.
You will hurt, you’re in the very early days and it’s the hardest and worst thing you’ll go through. But hang on, hang on for the next hour and then for the next.
I promise it will get easier, just keep going, put one for on front of the other and keep going. You will have some pretty shit days and that’s ok, let them happen , you have to walk through it all.
You are amazing, to do this with a child is hard but you’re doing it. Keep going!
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@Rute @Ali29 thanks both… I know it’s still such early days and I know I have to take these hard days because there not going anywhere…
Faith didn’t want to go for her lesson, she wanted to stay cuddled up in bed so maybe it was abit of a blessing?
It’s so hard as I know the 3 kids are all so hurt and I’m trying to be as strong as I can for them, whilst trying to deal with my feelings… I was with Shaun from the age of 15, I just don’t know life without him, if ever there was a problem, he would solve it, if I was ever unsure of something or scared he’d make it all better?
I just feel so lonely and lost 
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Yes, some days are just unbearable. My Rich was a fixer and so good at sorting most things, where as I was and am a flapper lol. I get myself all worked up but then sort it and I’m ok again. I guess the more I do the better I’ll get at it.
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I’m exactly the same! I have always been a worrier and stress head (as shaun would say) but now I’m a million times worse now though, I worry about absolutely everything, the littlest of things I now get myself into such a massive panic over and end up in tears xx
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Scarl34, don’t give yourself a hard time, I used to be a coper, I sorted stuff out for both of us when my husband began to loose his sight in his eye. He has been there since I was 17 and has always been in my life, strong and capable. But now I don’t feel able to cope with anything I feel panic most of the time and doubt myself. It’s such a shock but I guess we will manage, I hope your weekend goes ok, take care of yourself x