Struggling with Grieve

Hi I lost my Mum in March this year,
Would love to talk to someone who knows what its like to lose a parent everyone tells me it will get easier and i will learn to cope but i miss her so much it still hasn’t sunl in that shes gone forever. I have my Dad still he is 80 year old but everyday i worry untill i hear from him in the mornings. My anxiety has gotten worse since she passed its taking over my life.

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Hi there, so sorry about your Mum. I lost mine almost a year ago and still struggling. I can’t believe she’s gone.
I know people say it will get easier and we need to take our time to grieve but it still feels like a bad dream.
I have lost several close family members but nothing feels like this. It’s hell.
I’m sorry I can’t offer any solutions for you but hope it helps to know others understand and are there for you. Take care.

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Hi, sorry for your loss. I lost my Dad 17 years ago but still had my Mum. Although I was grieving I felt I had to stay strong for my Mum and that gave me a focus. People used to say to me time heals, but i think in time you learn to deal with it. There is no time limit on grief just take each day as it comes.

Sadly I lost my Mum in May having been diagnosed with cancer and told there is nothing they could do it was about managing the pain. We had 6 weeks with Mum, she is the first person I think of in the morning and last person at night. Take each day as it comes, some days I go hour by hour as the grief can just overcome me. I have found walking helps and setting myself small tasks throughout the day.

There are occasions where I have been feeling anxious, more so now as I am planning to go back to work next week and I haven’t been at work since the end of March.

This is a great forum to find people who are going through the same thing. Take care.

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Hi,
My Dad passed away in January and I still cant beleive hes gone. I often feel like hes just sat at home with my mum. I feel as time goes on people dont mention my dads death anymore as though they think I should have moved on by now but I havent. I have found journaling to be helpful as I write to my dad each evening about how my day has been and also the texts from Sue Ryder have helped and reassured me in how I am feeling.

Take care

Vicky x

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Hi Paulah76
I lost my mum last Dec and it still feels like yesterday The rawness of the grief has eased but I can honestly say the crying on a daily basis hasn’t. At this point I am not sure it will get easier. I think of my mum every moment of every day and so many things trigger me to cry for the slightest thing.
Anxiety I think is normal and I have been the same. Nothing prepares you for losing anyone and it’s cruel, hell, and so emotionally gut churning.
We are all going through it although we are at different stages of grief and we all deal with it differently. That’s all you can do is survive every day until you personally get a bit stronger and go from there. Reach out to people on here bec this site has been a godsend for me
Thinking of you
Deborah x

Hi, thank you for your reply and I’m sorry for taking so long to respond. I can’t seem to think straight and I’m so forgetful, I really worry that there’s something else going on but when I mention it to my GP she just says “it’s normal feelings for grief”. Well I’ve been through grief before but never felt like this. My Dad died when I was 12 of a sudden heart attack and it took me years to come to terms with that, my husband died of cancer 15 years ago, he had been diagnosed about 7 years before that so although not a shock was so hard to deal with. I wonder if the way I’m feeling is a sort of cumulative effect of unresolved grief? I feel like I’m losing my mind. It’s a year to the day since she had her stroke and I’m trying not to relive it. I don’t think I was really aware of what was going on although her consultant warned us she may not have long. Even after she died 2 weeks later it didn’t seem real, and still doesn’t, perhaps that was the start of the numb feelings in my head.
Have you returned to work yet? If so I hope it’s going ok and your colleagues are being supportive and understanding. Take care.

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Hi @paulah76 Lost my Dad in March. Sometimes I feel I’m doing ok & other times I’m struggling to make sense of it all. I too have anxiety ever since that day. I feel on edge & I can’t see it improving anytime soon tbh. Living day to day is the best idea. I wish I had some better advice. X

Hello I lost my mum in March to so it seems we are at the same stage of the grieving process!

My anxiety has been through the roof since to.

I feel sad all the time, I can’t stop thinking about her, she’s my first and last thought every single day.

People try and tell me I’m doing well but what they don’t know is that I’m really struggling to cope and get my head around her being truly gone.

It still doesn’t feel real at times and I imagine her still pottering around her home, I miss her so much!

I also find writing to her helps to some extent and I read a lot of books about the afterlife and believe she’s still around but it’s so hard not actually seeing her.

I’m sorry I’m not much help but sometimes it does help to know that someone else is going through similar circumstances and have more of a understanding to those that don’t have a clue how it feels to lose someone so close to you.

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Feel exactly the same. Just this afternoon, completely out of the blue I was in tears enormously over my mum. Some days just seem so long when you are on your own without her. It certainly is better when you’ve had (another) good cry. Sometimes I feel like I’m doing ok, then it just hits you again from nowhere and you wonder how you will ever get through it. Hugs. xxx

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Its been 19 months since I lost my dad very suddenly and it hasn’t gotten any easier. My brother isn’t aloud ring me anymore because I get awful anxiety attacks when he does incase its more bad news.

It hasn’t gotten easier for me - some days are okay, you never don’t think about it but some days you’re able to go about your day. Others are suffocating and you spend the whole day in floods. I think you just have to let yourself embrace the floods and grieve how you want. I don’t think it ever gets easier I think you just get better at pushing it aside for the time being. But I find the more you push it aside the worse the floods are.

Not sure if others feel the same