Hi. I recently joined and lost my Dad 3 weeks ago. He had been diagnosed with cancer which had spread…We cared for him at home so got to spend precious time with him and was with him when he passed. I feel so empty and lost now without him. Hard to accept I am.not going to see him again. All I seem to do is cry
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Dear @Sunflower7
Welcome to the community. I am sorry to hear of the loss of your dad. Even when we expect our loved one is going to pass it is still a shock. It is perfectly normal to cry. Nothing can prepare you for the emptiness, large hole they leave in our lives and that they are not coming back.
Grief is a rollercoaster of emotions. All of which is part of the grieving process. Have you family and friends that you can turn to for support?
They are organisations I can direct you to for someone to chat to or you can email online.community@sueryder.org for further information.
Please continue to reach out here and connect with other members under the topic Losing a parent who have experienced what you are going through.
You are not alone. Take care of yourself.
Pepsi
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Hi sunflower 7 I lost my dad on the 7th December he had been diagnosed with lung cancer in October he went into hospital on the 3rd Dec because he was dehydrated I thought he was coming home the next day but he got worse when I saw him in hospital he was semi conscious I hope he could hear me telling him how much I loved him I wish I could have had a conversation with him I miss him so much he was my only family if it wasn’t for my friends and colleagues I don’t know how I would survive xx
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Hi Pepsi
Thank you for welcoming me. Even though we knew Dad was very.poorly and didn’t have long it was still.a huge shock and hard to come to terms with. He has left a huge hole in my life.
Some days I seem to be ok and able to talk about Dad but other days I just get upset and think.of all the things we are no longer going to be able to do. I am very lucky to have a very supportive family and friends who I have been talking to about my emotions and ate all very supportive.
Thank you for your message
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Hi Jackie35
I am so sorry for your loss. It’s good you was able to spend some time with your Dad when he was in hospital before he passed and I am sure your Dad could hear everything you was talking to him about. It must be so hard for you to accept your Dad is no longer with you , try to remember all the good times and memories you had. It’s good you have supportive friends and colleagues around you so you can lean on them for support… We a.c. support each other on this group and share our grief xx
You are welcome @Sunflower7. I am so pleased to hear you have supportive family and friends. Please keep reaching out. We are always here for you.
Take care.
Pepsi
Hi, I’m really sorry for your loss. I hope you are doing ok? Has it helped talking on here? This is my first visit.
My elderly dad is seriously ill in hospital. We have been told he isn’t going to recover. I feel overwhelmed with grief. I’m not sure I want to see him before the end because I am such a wreck and don’t want to distress him. I also want to remember him as he was and not frail and struggling for breath. It just seems all so surreal that this is happening. I have never lost anyone close to me before and don’t feel that I can cope with these feelings. I can’t stop crying and can’t sleep.
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Hello Bex41
I am sorry to hear about your poorly dad. My Dad sadly passed in November. It’s heartbreaking and devastated… feeling so upset and lost without him…
I was like you, overwhelmed with emotion… its such a hard and difficult time… hope your getting some support… sleeping is difficult too
Takecare xx
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Hi Bex41
Thank you. I have good and bad days. Some days I am ok and another something will trigger me off and I spend most of the day crying thinking of Dad.I have found ithaa helped me to talk o here as you don’t realise how many people are going through the same as yourself and everyone is different how they cope.
I’m so Sorry your Dad your Dad is In hospital and very poorly. It’s so hard to see someone we love suffering and know they are not going to get better. I was exactly the same overwhelmed with grief and we all cope in different ways. Although I spent time with Dad before he passed I still remember Dad before he was ill and all the good memories I have. You have to do what’s best for you. Have you any family or friends around you for support to talk to and share your feeling a? I feel it’s so important talk and not bottle up.your grief and tears. Take care xx
Thinking of the things you will no longer do together is so sad isn’t it?
I lost my Dad at the end of September last year. I am feeling a little more accepting of things although I still feel so sad and empty at times
The thing I really struggle with and find hard to think about is his last few days in hospital. He went in with breathlessness and we thought he would be treated and come home. We were given devastating news over the phone, that he had cancer which had spread. We couldn’t go in to see or comfort him due to a no visiting policy at the time. I asked to see him due to the sad circumstances but due to Covid restrictions it was refused. I find it hard to think of him suffering in there after that awful diagnosis without our love and support.
We saw him in his last few hours though, as we were allowed in as he was dying, but he was semi conscious and I am not sure what he was taking in. I feel so sad at missing his last few days and letting him know how much he was loved. Everyone is different, one of my brothers choose not to visit in the last hours as he preferred to remember Dad as he was, I respect his choice and understand it was his way of coping.
I think crying and letting things out can be a release, take care x