I dont really know what to write but I am feeling really low and thought sharing on here would be a good place to start.
I lost my best friend of 21 years a month ago and her funeral was last week. She had lived abroad with her husband and 2 daughters for the last 10 years and so we only saw each other a couple of times a year and even less in the last couple of years due to Covid. She came home to the uk at the beginning if december but was very poorly. Her care team managed to get her strong enough to be with her family for Chtistmas which was brilliant and I was due to go and see her in January but she took a sudden turn for the worse and went into a hospice and passed away 3 days later. I never got to see her it was heartbreaking.
She was funny, caring, bubbly and beautiful inside and out and just filled any room with sparkle. She was the friend who just got me, even though we did not see each other all the time every time we would meet it would be like we had never been apart. For those special memories I am forever grateful, but knowing I will never be able to make any more memories with her is breaking my heart.
She was my firiend but really she was like a sister. Im just filled with so much sadness and finding it hard to cope with the waves of emotion that just make we want to cry. I know she would not want me to be sad but finding it hard to smile right now.