I’m struggling so bad and just wanted to put down in words really how I feeling. My situation is a bit strange so I suppose I’m seeing if anyone can relate.
My brother and me were estranged for years …he was successful normal etc there so much more to it but basically he was found dead the year before last(I only found out 3 months ago) well they suspected it was him but it was confirmed 3 days ago. I knew it was him anyways because of where he was found etc but when he died he was mentally ill and homeless. I’m struggling with how someone life’s could end in that way and I have so many questions that I know will never be answered. Mentally I haven’t been good since I found out.Panic Attacks, Anxiety etc During the night last night my dad died of a suspected heart attack. I honestly feel like I cant cope. I just feel today like everything is surreal like I’m not understanding that this has all happened like I can’t quite believe it’s all real and really happening. I feel like I’m lost wondering round in a daze.


Hello @Claire1210,

I’m sorry to hear about the loss of your brother and your dad. Having only just found out that your brother died and then losing your dad suddenly is such a lot to cope with. The feelings you are describing are common in the early stages of grief. Please keep reaching out for support - we are here for you. You may wish to explore our Grief Guide which can help you make sense of some of what you are going through.

You mention that you are struggling so I wanted to let you know that you can reach out to one of the following organisations who are always just a call or text away anytime you would like someone to talk to:

  • Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.
  • Shout are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text SHOUT to 85258 and talk to them about anything.
  • You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline here.
  • If you’re worried you’re going to hurt yourself, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E.

If you’re interested in counselling, we offer free sessions at Sue Ryder. You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.

Hopefully someone will be along to share their experiences but I wanted you to know that you have been heard and you are not alone.

Take care,