Struggling

My dad died 10 days ago peacefully at home after a long illness with cancer which had left him bed bound for the last 6 months. The last week he was in a lot of pain and had a syringe driver for pain relief ,this also made him sleepy. It was hard to watch a once very active man deteriorate before me. We had carers coming in 4 times a day which was a godsend and how he managed to stay at home with mum. I am usually a very emotional person ,cry at the drop of at hat-reading books, watching tv, etc. I thought I’d be in bits just now but I haven’t cried properly yet. His funeral was yesterday and I thought that would maybe be the trigger, but although I shed a few tears I still feel numb. Is this normal?

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@Port53 Sorry about your Dad. Grief takes many forms. There’s no right way to do it. Some weep & wail, others internalise until the dam bursts a year away from now whilst they’re walking around Sainsbury’s. It’s unknown territory, there’s no manual to follow. Just go with it. Numbness feels about right. Perhaps part of you is relieved he’s no longer suffering. X

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Hi, I would imagine in these early days of grief you might be feeling a sense of relief that your Dad is no longer suffering. In the aftermath of a death there’s a sense of shock as well, no matter how expected it has been. There will be lots of emotions that you’ll go through as you adjust to your loss. Don’t worry about what you feel, everyone will experience their own response. Take it day by day and be kind to yourself. Don’t impose expectations on yourself or others. This forum is very useful for helping you realise that you aren’t alone. Keep sharing how you feel because it will help. Best wishes, take care xx