sudden death of my dad

hi I am new here and just feel as tho I don’t have a purpose in life anymore. I lost my dad after a very short illness (10 days) in september. although I loved my dad very much I always felt that I was 2nd best to my brother and I always hoped that he would leave us before my mum because he would never have coped without her. I now feel so guilty that I had that thought and I never told him how much I loved him and I wasn’t with him when he died. I just don’t know what to do anymore,I try to be strong for my children but inside I am torn to pieces.

Hi Karen im very sorry for you loss .Youve come to the right place this special club understands death.There are people on here that have lost there dad .Greif takes its time how long ? the phrase how long is a piece of string definitely applies in this club.We are here for everybody some chat through private messages some chat on here .Dont be afraid to private message anyone (im not ) Have you seen your gp re medication to help (it works for me )Dont be a stranger keep on coming back Colin (57 my wife was 41 she passed march last year )

Hi Karen

I am so sorry to read of your loss. It is so hard to lose a parent, that sudden feeling that you are grown up properly. I lost my Dad over 20 years ago and had the same feeling as you, hoped he would go before Mum because he wouldn’t cope without her. I felt that same guilt and to be honest didn’t realise how much I loved him until it was too late to tell him. I feel he did know however and can only say to you that I am sure your Dad would have felt the same.

I am now in the situation that my Mum passed away last year so I have no parents and it is awful. As my Mum was ill I could tell her I loved her every day and I did.

Take each day as it comes and enjoy your children. They carry you inside them and your Dad so remember him in happier times every time you look at them.

Mel.

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