I lost my wife to cancer 15 years ago. Since then, I have changed career, travelled the world, remarried and had 2 awesome children who are now 5 and 3. I had my down moments, especially in the first year or two after Kate died, but, for some reason, all the grief NOW seems to be flooding over me. Has anyone ever experienced something similar?
Hi MrPaul2003,
Welcome to the Sue Ryder Online Community. I’m so sorry for the loss of your wife Kate 15 years ago, and for the sudden flood of grief you are now experiencing.
I read your other posts and you have mentioned that you were very “stoic” at the time Kate died and that you wish you had allowed yourself to crumble. Unfortunately, bottling things up after a bereavement can cause problems and it sounds as though you didn’t fully give yourself a chance to grieve.
It is not too late to reach out and get some support, and I am glad that you have found this site. We have some other people here who are coping with loss long-term, for example a user called illneverbethesame posted a little while back about struggling with the death of their mum 10 years on: https://support.sueryder.org/community/life-after-bereavement/i-cant-believe-shes-gone-even-after-10-years
It sounds as though you might benefit from some counselling or bereavement support - if you make an appointment with your GP they can refer you to services in your area.
Have you talked to your second wife about how you are feeling? Is she understanding?