I scream silently in my mind
Thousands of questions running wild
Ifs and shoulds and coulds will only push me further
Into the despair that I must endure now that we are over
See it wasn’t like our love had passed or wasn’t meant to be
It was just the voices in your head, shouting violently
They took you from me sooner than we could have ever hoped
My despair at your loss is sending me to a place I cannot cope.
My love for you will never die but life it must go on
Day by day hour by hour without you feels so wrong
How can this be I ask myself time after time
The only hope I take from this is the peace now in your mind.
Check in on me from time to time a sign I would adore, be it a swan a stag or a doe when i see it I’ll know for sure. And in that sign I will find a way to always endure.
This pain I feel without you near will lessen in due time.
But until then Ill muddle through without you by my side.
I hope that you are now at peace and waiting for me to join but until then sleep tight my love ill be with you evermore.


Dear Kate, I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your poem. Sending you lots of love and hugs.


This is so poignant Kate. It also sums up everything I feel - I also lost my husband to suicide eight months ago.
Please be kind to yourself and I hope that writing can continue to be an outlet for you - I can’t bring myself to put pen to paper.
Sending you a big hug.