My baby had a brain AVM. He was only 47 and it didn’t hold him back! We had an amazing life and traveled a lot as we didn’t have children. Martin had a lot of treatment over the years, but to look at him you would never know anything was wrong. He collapsed in front of me after a devastating bleed on the brain…. I will never get over it… xx❤️
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My gorgeous Martin x
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It was our 11th wedding anniversary two days after his funeral last month… I’m just heartbroken x
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Jesus christ 2 night dottie, what a nitemare. Dreadfully sad. When it happens so suddenly.
My husband went into hospital for a hip operation & after he tripped & fell, after 2 days they told me he was coming home.
but he suffered a stroke they said the heart wasent pumping the blood around his lungs, & he died 4 & a half weeks later, & I thought I was going off my head with grief.
So I can imagine the pain you are in. Its unbearable when u don’t expect it.
I do hope u have family 2 help u through this terrible time.
I came home from the hospital on my own. Oliver’s family & his children where there but we was all in a state of shock.
Big hugs. Xx
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My brother has been a God send. He comes and stays every other night. I would be lost without him. Martin was also his best friend, so he’s also devastated…. Thank you for your kind words and taking time to respond. I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful husband also…, it’s an awful boat we find ourselves in. Sending you love … x❤️
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Dottie it is very early days in 2 Yr grief & it is a living hell, & i must say u & Martin looked so happy together,
& thats the hardest part when they r not there any more,
& nothing & no 1 can ease Yr pain. U just keep thinking of Yr lovely husband Martin.
& take each day as it comes.
Talk any time u want, if I miss it I’ll get back 2 u.
Xx
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Hi Dottie . Beautiful photos . Happy memories to keep , but we only wanted to make more , with our love of our life , our best friend, it’s just heartbreaking . To think of our future without them here loving us . Xtake carex
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I know exactly how you feel, sometimes I forget my husband is no longer here then it hits me hard. It does help talking but I do feel that I am a burden or a record player that’s got stuck! I miss him and although it hasn’t been a year yet it’s not getting any easier 
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I can’t believe it was sixteen days ago that I started this thread. I don’t know whether it is just me but time seems so strange now. When my husband was here there never seemed to be enough hours in the day to do the things we wanted to do. Now, it just drags on and on, never ending drifting from one day to the next. Sometimes it’s hard to distinguish one day from another. I don’t know how or if things will get better. If this is how life will be from now on it is going to be a very sad life lived for me. I’m sorry for this very downbeat post. I hope I haven’t upset anyone.X
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Loobyloo2 u r rcertainly not being downbeat it is very early days for u. & we r all in the same boat of sadness on here.
& when we lose a loved 1 the days do just drag on.
When my husband died, I said every day felt a week & a week felt like a month.
Nothing we can do, which is so nice being able 2 read other people’s stories of grief, it lets us know we r not alone.
Just take each day as it comes. & good luck. X
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Every morning when I get up and see it’s only 5 or 6am, I think how am I going to get through such a long day. This morning, I managed to stay in bed a couple of hours more and I was relieved at having been able to shorten at least once these eternal days that get more and more difficult to get through. My active life I had with my soulmate has now become a passive existence, watching the world going by, no enthusiasm, no laughter, not being a part of it really, just doing what needs doing, trying my best to carry on for my childrens’ sakes.
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@Broken2222
I have always been ok with my own company but that doesn’t stop me missing the company of my husband desperately so I know what you mean. Anyone else giving me company would make very little difference as they are not him.
Just as you say, the evenings just being together with a bit of TV or the odd day out in to the countryside. It was all we needed, happy with each other. A visitor just makes me more tired a lot of the time.
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You don’t have to worry on here about what you say. We all know we have extremely low times. I hope you will have some less low ones sometime but it is very early yet.
I feel for me it is early yet although I can’t believe it is now over 5 months since my darling husband died. In some ways it feels forever yet in others I can’t believe I’ve lived that amount of time without him.
Keep visiting here whenever you need to.
Hugs. x
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Hi KarenF, yes I would rather be on my own ,than trying to make conversation with others. Especially when they don’t understand . Of course I want and need my husband here with me ,to continue our happy life. But sadly I know it will never happen ,not in this life. I get it about visitors making you more tired . Trying to act normal Infront of them and hide the fact that your heart is shattered and your partner is on your mind every second of every day . Totally drains me .sending love and hugs to all xtake carex
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