24 weeks today! It’ll be 6 months on the 29th July. I cant believe how quick the time has gone. I miss him so much every day.
What have i done to get here? I’ve taken very small steps, I’ve put one foot in front of the other and got through the day. I have dealt with each challenge as it has arisen and I’ve stopped looking too far into the future. I have stopped saying ‘what if’, because quite frankly it wont change anything. I’ve stopped hankering after what we should have been doing and focusing on what can I do now.
At the beginning, I could never imagine my life without him, how the hell was I going to do this. How was I going to survive without him.
Part of my strength comes from friends, some from family, some from me, my stubbornness to not let grief take me too, not while I can breath. Most of my strength comes from him, my partner, my best friend. He couldn’t but I can and I owe it to him to live. That doesn’t mean I forget him, don’t hurt for him, don’t yearn for him, don’t wish it didn’t happen. But i have to live.
This weekend i went away camping for the first time without him. I thought i would be a mess the whole time and the planned weather certainly gave me an excuse to cancel but I didn’t and I had a really nice time.
I know everyone’s situation is different but don’t give up, just adjust and see where it leads. Believe me, not every day is a good day but I’ll take them when they come.
@Pudding The early days are so hard and you wonder how the hell am i going to
survive this
2)Get through life without them
But we do, we have no choice. We can drag ourselves through life kicking and screaming, or we can give in gracefully and just get on with it.
I believe, our lives are set (not everyone agrees and that’s ok) and for whatever reason I’ve been thrown onto this path. I will find out why as I travel it. Life unfortunately doesn’t stop for us to get off with them, if it did, we would have all jumped off.
I came across this earlier and thought I’d share - I think it ties in with what’s being said.
You can shed a tear that he is gone,
Or you can smile because he has lived,
You can close your eyes & pray that he will come back,
Or you can open your eyes & see all that he has left.
@Ali29 thank you for the positive post. I’m 15 weeks on this journey and can relate to some of what you say. I find if I keep busy, have plenty plans in my diary I can cope better. I thought in the very early days I wouldn’t get this far. I still have bad days/hours but definitely less than at the beginning. Your insight gives me hope than I can move forward while keeping my darling husband forever in my heart.
I’ve found it hard recently and it’s been 5 months since Keef left me. So today I have been organising a garden party to celebrate his life. There were quite a few people who were unable to come to the thingy in March and since the weather is much better now I thought that I should try and do something positive. So this has now become my main focus to keep me busy.
xxx