Just 4 weeks ago I lost my wife of 20 years to cancer she was 65yrs old from diagnosis to passing was just 10 short weeks most of it spent in hospital. I am a bit lost at the moment and can’t seem to concentrate on anything or be interested in any of my hobbies. I seem to spend my day aimlessly moving about with no purpose. I constantly have crying episodes with no explanation I assume these are normal reactions in the circumstances how are others on here dealing with this. I realize it is only 4 weeks since my wife died and I have long road to travel.


Hi TCJR, I’m so sorry about the loss of your wife, as you rightly say 4 weeks is a very short time, everybodies journey is different, it’s 10 years since my husband died in similar circumstances to your wife, I still miss him, but have learnt to live with it, at the beginning I must of cried every day for about 6 months, I tried to keep busy and go for a walk with my dog every day in the fresh air, it did help, take a day at a time, some will be better than others, just go with it, sending love Jude x

My wife passed away suddenly 9 weeks ago she was 64. Like you l am still lost. I have been told l should take baby steps one day at a time. That is easier said than done. I have gone back to work to try to keep my self occupied but l have no enthusiasm or motivation for it. It is going to be a long road ahead with no future to look forward to with her. It is only my 5 year old grandson who keeps me going.
Take care of yourself

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Hi TCJR, I’m sorry for the loss of your wife, it’s so tough.
My soulmate passed away very suddenly 14 weeks ago and I understand how you are feeling, I have no motivation either, I just try to get through day by day.
I cry many times everyday, I also get very upset over the slightest thing and don’t recognise the person I’ve become, part of me died that day and I have changed, I am very angry just want to hide away.
You are just starting this journey, I’m told there are different stages of grief but I feel like I’m treading water.
I guess everyone’s journey is different and I’ve learned not to put too much pressure on myself to make decisions about the future.
I wish you well and I think it does help to know there are people on here who understand.
Take care

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Hi TCJR. I lost my partner of 28 years to cancer 4 months ago. She was also 65. From diagnosis to her passing was almost exactly a year. In that time she went through the most horrendous treatments and suffered greatly .I was always optimistic that she would be cured, but it was’nt to be. I know how tough this is especially for you as its such a short time since your wife passed away. I’m assuming that you , like me , are retired which tends to give us a lot of time on our hands. The crying is perfectly normal I still have bouts of it now .Although over time it has lessened sometimes I’m reminded of something that we did or she liked and I’m off again. It will get easier but in the mean time everything you’ve said is normal. Grief is a very strange thing. Nothings right or wrong you just cope the best you can. I would advise you to continue posting on here. I’ve found it a comfort to write things down knowing that people that read it will totally understand. Best wishes to you and I’m so sorry for the loss of your wife.


A big thanks to all that have replied to my post on my wife’s passing.I have found it a great comfort that what I am going through I am not alone and my sorrow is normal.

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You have grieve is hard lost my john 15month ago to cancer looked after him for 10month before he passed take every day at a time lv annie x