The club you never wanted to join

One day your life is normal, you muddle along expecting everything to carry on the same and then without warning suddenly it all changes and you find yourself in a club you never wanted to join, the bereavement club!!! Everything you believed in and relied on is gone, your world has changed beyond all recognition and you are totally alone. People you thought you could rely on disappear, others say things like it will get better in time, of course they have no idea, they have never suffered that type of loss. The agony is like nothing you have ever experienced, you can’t imagine how you could survive it and you hope you won’t. At first there is the numbness, then the real pain kicks in and you can hardly breathe. When people talk to you about it, they say things like you lost your husband, you want to scream at them, I didn’t lose him, if he was lost I could find him, or they say your late husband, he isn’t late, if anything he is early in the next life, I understand that people don’t know what to say, they think by not saying he died somehow it won’t be so bad, one day if they are unlucky they will find out. So all of us on here know what it is really like to belong to this club we never wanted to join and only on here can we voice how we really feel and know that others will truly understand. Thank you to everyone on here for being there when nobody else is, sending love and hugs to you all x

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Hi this is exactly how I feel .x

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So accurate. Sending hugs

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My feelings exactly

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@Lynn2 hi Lynn every word you said is so very true. You put it perfectly. Sending hugs x

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You couldn’t have written this any better. It so describes how we all feel. X

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My feeling too :broken_heart::broken_heart:

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Thank you Lynn all what you have said is very true x

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Totally empathise with everyone It feels like your on a revolving wheel going through the motions of everyday life but it is not the same as before treading water trying to keep afloat which seems to get harder as each day passes. Will it get better ? It has been nearly eight months now still cannot accept my soulmate will not walk through the door again.

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Feel the same

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Totally agree it’s horrible I don’t think it will get easier worse if any thing another evening alone hope we manage to sleep xx

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So true. Your exactly right x

I completely understand. X

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Wow the words make me gulp as i read them… spot on xxx

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Lynn, you took the words right out of my mouth :cry::cry::cry:

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This is exactly how I feel.

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Chrissy its 8 months for me too and for all I miss my soul mate and best friend some days I feel calm others I’m a mess. These tidal waves just keep coming.
I have some lovely friends and amazing family I still miss my husband so much and I keep thinking he’s isn’t coming back. We are all on our own now and have to keep going. Hope everyone is alright xx

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Hi Lynn, how bloody true , people Moaning about being depressed when they know you have lost your partner and are trying to pull yourself every day out of bed they are the worse and I’ve had a few of them , I want to scream how the hell
Do you think I feel !! I know Tony would want me to live and try to enjoy life so I carry on but it’s bloody hard and made harder by people just not thinking about what they say xx love to all of you in our bereavement group xx

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It’s 8months for me aswell and still looking for home every day. It’s just heartbreaking but we have to be brave and each cope as best we can. :heart::broken_heart:X

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So comforting to read all your replies to know I am not alone - Met a lady today who lost her husband to pancreatic cancer a year earlier than mine She broke down in tears so it is still raw for her too . Thank you for your thoughts xx

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