The loss of my fiance

In January my fiancée, and mother of my daughter, passed away after a 9 month fight against AML Leukaemia. She was 32. Since then I’ve concentrated on our daughter (who is soon to turn 2) and don’t feel like I’ve even begun to address my own grief.

She was the bedrock of us as a couple, so strong so thoughtful and so capable, I just feel completely lost without her. I’m petrified im making mistakes in raising our little girl. I’m so lonely and despite support of loved ones I feel like nothing can ever fill this yawning void in my life. I have the usual feelings of guilt as well. When I have a good day it feels like a betrayal almost. Whereas I was always positive about my life going forward all I see is nothingness. Just feeling a little lost.

After a couple of disastrous relationships, I finally found the person who turned my life around…loving, caring, compassionate and ceaselessly making me giggle, so much FUN! I always maintained it took me fifty-five years to get it right! We were expecting to “sail into the sunset together” , maybe thirty years, not a mere thirteen, he narrowly missed our tenth wedding anniversary. I have no idea how to fill this void. I totally relate to how you feel!

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Thank you Minnie. Life can be so impossibly cruel sometime. Just when you think youve got everything you ever wanted it gets snatched away. It does help knowing other people have experienced this and come through the other side. I’m so sorry for your loss and thank you for taking the time to reply.

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I am so sorry to hear this. I’ve just lost my partner, I posted about it today.

I am so sorry to hear this. I lost my partner very suddenly in January in an unexplainable road collision. We were planning to get married, lost a baby just before his accident and were planning to try again. He was my soulmate, we both believed we had met for a reason . I totally understand the feeling of a void even though you have lots of support around you. It’s lovely that you have your daughter though to concentrate on and put all your love into, I have a son from a previous relationship who keeps me going. I live in the hopes that it all gets easier to cope with overtime. It’s good to talk though, talking helps me