Trying to cope with the sudden loss of my fiance at only 37

I lost my beautiful fiance Hayley on march 7th this year, our beautiful daughters lost there mummy and they are only 7 and 5. I’m completely lost and overwhelmed at facing the rest of our lives without her. Hayley passed away suddenly with no explanation at this time, Hayley and I have known each other since we were 13 and fell in love 10 years ago. I just don’t know what I’m doing without her by my side. If it wasn’t for our daughters I honestly don’t know how I would have got this far but I have to for them more than anything they need me so much, telling them there mummy had died was the worst/hardest thing I’ve ever had to do next to being with Hayley at the end and trying to save her life watching every part of her soul leaving her body right Infront of my eyes and I couldn’t save her. Im so broken and keep having flash backs of that night, i keep replaying it over and over. I miss her so much and everyone I see our little girls missing her it breaks me even more. I don’t know how I can ever give them what Hayley gave to them and that scares me so much I keep thinking about our future with out her and can’t make sense of it. The week after Hayley passed it was mother’s Day, in the next to months its our daughters birthdays and would have been Hayley’s birthday, it’s just to much to bare. I feel like my heart’s been ripped out like I’ve lost half of me I have no identity without her, we were soulmates on the highest level and had so many plans for our families future. I’m hoping to find some help from this from others that are going or have been through this at such a young age with such young children, this is something I have not been able to find as yet and I feel so alone.

1 Like

I am so sorry for the horrendous situation that you are in. My husband died suddenly and we have no explanation yet. My children are young adults, so a slightly different situation, but it hurts to loose a parent at any age. It hurts to loose you soulmate so, so much - we were together from 16. You will find support on this forum but also talk to your GP and contact Cruse Bereavement. There will also be people along to tell you who to contact to help your children as well, I’m sure. Winston’s Wish is one that is good for supporting children. We all understand the pain you are going through. Sending hugs

Hello @Chris38

I’m so sorry to hear about your fiance. It sounds as though things are very tough at the moment and you are feeling overwhelmed.

I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you are feeling here, and I hope that you find the community a good source of support. Everyone here has experienced the loss of a loved one and will understand some of what you are going through.

In addition to the suggestions @Jules4 made above, I thought I would let you know Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here:

Take care,

Online Community team

@Chris38 I’m sorry you and your daughters are now in this position, sadly there are no easy answers. The feelings you describe are perfectly normal, if you read any of the posts on here you will find everyone describing the same emotions as you are feeling. If it gets too much, contact your GP, they are there to help you, you can request counselling from SR or Cruise. I found I got a lot of help from reading and posting on here
I hope you and your girls can have a reasonable day tomorrow

1 Like

My husband, soulmate died, he took his life earlier this month, I too can’t imagine life without him being with me, e were to grow old together, our children live all over the UK, so I will no doubt have to sell our home to be nearer family, I understand nothing, I m just now broken and feel lost.