I have no idea how I found this site. Guess that’s my mum meddling again lol. Lost my mum last week and it’s been the most horrendous week of my life. I haven’t even had time to grieve due to family dynamics and I’m scared its gonna hit me when I least expect it. Or have I already done my grieving over the last few weeks knowing it was coming in which case I feel a little guilty at hardly crying so far. I’m just so tired
Hi tillwemeetagain,
I so understand where you’re coming from. My mum had alzheimers and was only diagnosed 6 months ago. Then 2 months ago she went in to a local dementia centre to get medication sorted out. Thought it was for a couple of days. 6 weeks later she gets transferred to a different hospital and within a week we are told out if the blue to get up there quick as she has taken a turn for the worse!! Until that point
I thought we had years with her! She held on for a week, but it was awful watching her starve and dehydrate to death. I am so angry, but her passing was a blessing when it came. Nobody should have to endure that. My god…we shoot animals because we say its humane. Im just so lost with how i feel
Thank you for your words. I just feel I’m going numb and I dont want to take it out of anyone in the household. (Only my adult daughter and fiancé at home ). Im always the “its gonna be ok” person in the family and they seem to be back to normality with it all already. Didn’t even go to my mums funeral because my step father banned my 2 sisters from going because they hadn’t been in touch for years. They travelled up from England and I had to tell them the night before funeral and couldn’t go and leave them out. I’m so hurt xxx
That’s so spooky. I took my sisters out to the cremarorium an hour after the service so we could see the flowers I had ordered outside. I had requested rainbow roses on my “mum” flowers and I picked them off the wreath and gave 1 to each of us. One of my sisters phoned yesterday and has arranged for us to send the rainbow roses to someone to incase them in a paperweight so it’ll be a keepsake. Just away to send it in post this afternoon. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. How are you doing? X
Completely understand the need for space. I have always retreated to my bedroom with a book when I feel overwhelmed with life. It sometimes takes it out of me to be around others. I need to be in a good place to have the energy to want to be with anyone outside my household. And that was before this all happened! I’m doomed 
lol. So glad you have family that understand your moods and can support you when you need it. I cant imagine how strong you are having to be right now, but your strength gives me hope 
of course I’ll post a photo when I get the paperweight back. She says it takes about 3 months x
Flora forever. Its a lady called sara from Chester. She sounds lovely on the phone. Sent off the rose this afternoon. I’ll definitely post a photo when it comes back x
Thank you so much. It really has helped speaking to you. Take care and hope to speak again soon. X