Yes, all you all are feeling is just what I went through and still going through. I have now come to the conclusion that how I feel now is how I will be for the rest of my life. The first few months I felt that my life should also end but it didn’t and I’m still here, as they say, waiting for God. Life goes on no matter how we feel. We have lost our soul mates but I feel they will be waiting for us when we are allowed to go. Life is hard but it keeps on going and we have to keep going, it does get easier, just not the same. We have to put a brave face on but what happens behind closed doors is different.
Blessings S
Hi Lily, sorry it’s taken a while to reply. Sometimes I just don’t want to talk to anybody. Yes our other halves would have been very upset with us.
Sometimes I have good days but mostly still missing my lovely wife. Sometimes my world just comes crashing down again but not so much lately.
I was having a particularly bad few days a little while ago and by the third day I was thinking about my wife and an image, not a memory, popped into my head. She was propped up in her hospital bed and she put her hand on my arm, looked me in the eye and said emphatically “You have a duty to live your life! I didn’t have a choice but you do. Live your life”
I’m pretty sure it was my own mind knowing what she’d say but I felt better, thinking that she’s right. I still miss her terribly and I still have weepy times and I expect I will for the rest of my life but I think I’ve taken a small step forward.
Take care of yourself,
H.
Hi Haitch, yes these images do pop into your head and also ideas which you ask yourself ‘where did that come from’. I don’t think there is anything wrong or right about the grieving thing and waves come and go. There’s a poem about it and how you learn to walk back up the beach before the wave hits you. The main thing to remember is that life goes on, no matter what is happening inside us. My own wave is going out again just now, so I will keep myself very busy which helps me.
Blessings xxx