whether to go to the wake or not advice

my mum died on sunday and she didnt want a wake but my dad has decided to have a wake anyway she djus wanted us to come home afterwards and she didnt want a wake and im not sure whether to go or not because it wasnt what my mum wanted but a couple of family member thinks i should go and im worried i will look bad if i dont go and i dont know what to do does anyone have any advise

I am so sorry about the dilemma you find yourself in and your loss. None of this is easy and any added worries seem out of all proportion. It’s so difficult to give advice because I don’t know all the circumstances.
I would suggest that it’s not what others think you should do but what you want to do. Have you anyone close you can talk to about this?
A wake can be a celebration of a good life. If you can pluck up the courage to go then fine. But if it upsets you too much then leave it.
Sorry, I’m not much help, but remember, your emotions are raw at the moment and so many things can come up that upset you. Take your time and take it easy, well, as easy as you can. Blessings.

Hi, i found both of my parents wakes really difficult. I went to my dad’s for about ten minutes and then went to bed! That was a long time ago. For my mums, which was last year, I went for the start and then made myself responsible for my kids and some of the other kids there and took them to the cinema! I think you have to do what you want to do, but try to tell your dad that is how you are feeling. Everyone grieves really differently and it’s fine for you to want to do what you felt your mum wanted. I have to say that my mum had lots of wishes and things that she said at the end and we simply haven’t been able to honour all of them. Your mum loves you whatever you do and will definitely be wanting you to be ok more than anything. As my mum always said to me ‘you have to put yourself first.’ - whatevere that looks like for you, without worrying about what everyone else wnats. Hope this helps.

The best advice is the one that comes from within you. Take out the external influences because this is not about them, it’s about you and your mum. Why not ask your mum? She lives on in you and spirit and you may hear the answer you are seeking.
This is a big decision for you so don’t allow others to pressurise you. Ask yourself if there was a reason your mum didn’t want a wake and if so does it resonate with you also?
I am sure your mum will give your heart the answer it is seeking and remember there is no right or wrong in whatever you choose as it will never change the love between you and your mum as that will always be with you regardless. Trust your intuition