Why do I miss someone I never knew

I’m looking for some help , I lost my dad when I was 2 years old and I feel like I shouldn’t miss him like I don’t have a right to, I don’t have any memory’s of him I only know what he looks like from pictures I don’t know his voice or his laugh. I miss him so much but I feel like I’m not allowed I just wish I had memories with him I want to know him and I don’t, I know him from other people’s memories I just need help it eats me up everyday.

I’m so sorry to hear that you lost your dad at such a young age and that you can’t remember him. It’s completely natural for you to miss him greatly. At two years old, you would have loved your dad very much, and had a real relationship with him, and that is something you lost, whether you remember it or not - you have every right to grieve. I’m glad that you’ve found this site, and I hope it helps even a tiny bit to have somewhere you can talk openly about your feelings.

The charity Winston’s Wish, which supports bereaved children, has some information for adults who were bereaved as children. They also run an Adults Bereaved as Children Facebook group - perhaps you might find it helpful to post there as well, to find people who’ve had similar experiences.

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Hi. emx. You have every right to feel as you do. Try not to be critical of yourself. He was your dad and that gives you every right to try and find out more about him. It is possible to love someone we have never met. It is you know! Ask around the family, if possible. Build a picture of him in your mind or in a journal. It will help you to get closer to him. No one is ever ‘lost’. All the time they are in your thoughts how can they be lost?
Take care and try not to thrash yourself with thoughts of guilt. You will know him and be happy that he was your dad. Give yourself time. Nothing is easy in grief. Blessings. John.

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