Why is it getting harder

As ive said before i lost my husband on May 12th this year he was 57 and it was a total shock. So weve had the funeral, weve had his ashes returned and im not coping. Made worse today because our 24 year old son returned to Australia where he has lived for four years and ive had a complete meltdown. Then i felt guilty for him seeing me so upset.
Although its breaking my heart to see him go his dad was so so proud of him as am i. I think the next few days are going to be really hard…every day is tbh :broken_heart:
Love and strength to all of you :heart:


Cant you go live in australia with him !? I went at 22 , as i have family there as my grandad was a £10 pom … id be off if i had close family there :frowning: you would get in as well x

Hi Bev
I know exactly how you are feeling, my husbands funeral was on May 10th, he passed away 26 days after his diagnosis which has left us all in total shock. My youngest son went to Australia with his girlfriend only 5 days after the funeral. I took him to Manchester airport and only just managed to hold back my tears until he was out of sight. My husband knew they were both going and had jobs to go to however their jobs do not start until August but he could not cope with what had happened to his Dad and just went. My eldest son lives close by however at a time I feel we should be together facing this devastatingly painful journey my youngest son is the other side of the world which I feel makes the loss of their Dad and my incredible husband even more painful and like you I am just constantly in tears.


Deb I would in a heartbeat but have three daughters and four beautiful grandaughers here and i just couldnt leave them. If i just had Aaron i would :heart:


Oh @Betty21 I feel so much for you i really do. Aaron is settled there and has a close friendship group and i know he will be ok…i know he worries about me though. I/we were lucky because we had him here for a few weeks after his dads funeral.
They have each other for support but i completely understand wanting all of your family around you at this devastating time.
Its all so raw and so unexpected you feel like you a living in an altered universe and everyone else is just getting on with their normal lives…as they should be but its hard to put a smile on your face everyday when our lives have changed forever. Please take care sending love and a big hug :heart:


Ah … least you got them ! X

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Hes probably just devastated and its his way of coping ! Ive felt like running away from it all myself ! Still do tbh … just to escape the pain x


@Deb5 i know what you mean but the pain just goes with you. I dont think there is anything we can do apart from take each day as it comes and try and battle through it… its all just so unfair :cry::broken_heart::heart:


I lost my husband on 29th May, & its horrific, the pain is unimaginable unless youve been though it yourself. He was 54 years young, all our plans for our future & retirement are gone. Im so lost & hurting! I cant cope! I just want to be with him :cry::broken_heart:


I know …its the most terrible pain you will ever feel isnt it ? Just awful … but it does get less painful with time as you come to terms with it ! Having said that i still have bad days but its not as bad as those first few months !! Xxx honest! Xxx


Yeh thsts true. I went in a break to filey a few months ago and i still cried for him … its the memories ! It kills you remembering all those happy times you both had !!! And its no more ! I said to him few days before he passed - i dont want you to go and he said i dont want to go either !!! How unfair is that ! And i agree a day at a time xx


We were together 63 years st age 16 people said we couldn’t know true love but we did we were soul mates lovers and friends. We were so in love he made me feel I was the most beautiful person in the world (I’m not ) but that gave me so much confidence in myself now I have none. My heart hurts so badly. Family snd our special friends are do good and loving snd take me out but I want him back so so badly I can’t breathe. I feel that no one had the right to take him from me I feel that I should have been able to fix it for him. But as my widowed sister said to me It Don’t Work like that/ this is something you can’t fix