Both my nan and grandad died within a few months of each other, however, this was 7 years ago. I was 13 at the time and I thought I had grieved and I was okay, but the last few years as I’ve gone through a lot of stuff I feel myself missing them almost every single day. I feel that as it’s been 7 years I should be over it?
There is no time limit on grief and people are affected differently. There are days when I literally talk to the photos on the side and then go to bed and cry I dont have family and am recently retired and the days and evenings are a nightmare weekends alone as always-there has to be more to life than this!!!
It’s a milestone every month for me and it feels like a year has gone by , not a year. I am struggling badly at the loss of my husband. It was 10 months yesterday and I am disabled myself so have too much time to ruminate. It feels like it gets worse not easier.
My dad died when I was 18. My mum and dad had separated when I was12, and my mum ,sister and I had moved to another country. One night a policeman arrived at the door and told us my father had been killed in a hit and run. We went to the funeral, we went home, and got on with our lives. I got married, had a child and suffered post natal depression. During that time I started to really miss my dad, I didn’t want to see my mum or anyone else, just him. He was a violent alcoholic, and made our lives a misery as kids, but that’s when my grieving process started.
Maybe you are going through changes in your life that has triggered all that grief again. It will pass, but none of us can live in the past . My mum has now passed away recently, and I miss her everyday, but we have to move on. There is still so much life to be lived, and we have to carry on and live the lives we are given. We can’t change anything. It was their time to go, but it wasn’t ours, so we have to carry on without them. As the other writer said, we are all here to offer support. You are not alone.
I agree; I lost my husband just over a year ago and don’t know how I would have coped without my family around me. I had to move house as it was in his name only and again; my family gave me enormous help and support. I am now settled in my own house but have days when I want to ‘hide away’ I have photographs everywhere and I talk to them as I go around the house as each photo brings back a memory which I don’t want to forget.