Why do we think all these negative thoughts in the evening? I’ve just spent the last 30 mins or so re running the last two days at home before my wife went into the hospice where she died a week later. Had to put on some awful television to try to focus on something else. So upsetting.
I lost my husband 10 weeks ago to lung cancer and I was with him until the end. Evenings are always the worst as it is dark and quite. Your feelings and thoughts just run away with you.
I put the TV on just for noise as I don’t watch it because I cannot concentrate.
It’s just awful isn’t it. My wife died of breast cancer that became secondary and spread everywhere. She wanted to go into the hospice and they did a wonderful job in looking after her. I was with her at the end as well, as was our daughter. Just think about the last few weeks quite a lot but try to focus on pre pandemic 2020 when she was well, happy and herself. But it’s very hard.
I totally agree with you it is hard and I don’t feel it gets any easier. I feel like everything is just a blur. I try to think of our conversation we had in the last two months. My husband was given the diagnosis the day after our wedding anniversary and he only lived for 2mths. I kept my promise and didn’t leave his side.
I’m trying to think of all the happy times together but that makes me cry. It is true what they say that they take half of you with them.
It’s why that person is your other half. Together you make a whole and are complete.
And it’s a blur isn’t it. Try to remember the good times as the last few days are a blur and hard to remember but maybe that’s your brain trying to protect you.