Hi, here iam again wide awake hardly slept feel so sick. cant even stomach a coffee. this grief has hit me so hard. im on sleeping even on sleeping tablets which were the last resort for me. i prefer natural remedies.
everytime i close my eyes i see my beautiful nan and i just miss her so much. i dont want to bother my daughters as they work and have uni. im trying to keep busy and everyday i write a journal just one page to my nan just telling her what ive been doing.
My nan was like my mum she raised myself and my brother as my mum was unable to care for us
i will eventually fall to sleep but my sleeping pattern is all over the place
sending love to everyone
love chelle x
So sorry to hear. Its horrible being awake in the early hours with your mind whizzing round especially after taking a sleeping tablet. I hope you managed to get back to sleep xx
Morning, yes its awful and feeling sick too. i managed an hour but my naughty cats woke me up lol
thanks for your message
love chelle x
Morning i am finding it hard to sleep a couple of weeks before my husband passed away he said to me i do not understand why you are still with me you have not got a life anymore as you are stuck looking after me i would not blame you if you walked away i keep hearing him saying that to me it 4 months since i lost him
Hiya, i get off to sleep fine but wake up dripping in sweat bad dreams etc have tried everything CBD oil helped but not sure i wanna keep doing that. sending hugs
love chelle x
Oh Sue, bless you, i would do anything for the ones i love . always here if you wanna talk even if its in the middle of the night sending hugs
love chelle xx
Thats what i told my husband i said you can not get rid of me that easy i love him and stood by him untill the end
Awww i have 2 very naughty kittens that my Son bought me to keep me company x
absolutely your a star, and i done the same when my grandad passed i would do his shopping cooking everything because we love them so much.
love chelle xx
my cats help me everyday its something to get up for. my boy cat jesse lays with me when im upset its like he knows i need the support cats are very intellegent and im so happy your lovely son got them for you.
love Chelle xx
hiya, yes i have literally tried everything, last resort was sleeping tablets. getting off to sleep is ok its staying asleep. i do try not to nap in day. how are you doing today??
love Chelle xx
Its torture when you cant sleep.
I lost my partner last may 5th and wow i still think of her every spare moment.
I looked after her for 3yrs when we were hit with the news she had stage 4 cervical cancer.
I watched her change from a beautiful young lady into a vulnerable, weak and tired sole.
Ive made the settee in our living room my place of rest for almost 4yrs now.
I tend to stay awake for around 2 days and feel so shattered on 3rd day ,i sleep all day.
I can’t for some reason return to our bed we shared .if its because she passed in her own bed like she wanted,or i cant get the final ,awful 3days as i watched her body shutting down.
That menory is etched in my brain and hate to think other couples are going through, or have witnessed such a episode.
I go to bereavement counciling once a week ,which i like.
But my time at night is spent on ,which anyone who know me would never expect such a thing.
I have began to write poems of what enters my head at that moment of time .
If it helps ,i dont know but time will tell.
Ive already posted one on the community website, so please read and i hope i dont offend anyone.
Bear with me as i copy and paste.
People say when loved ones pass,
That time is one good healer,
Well 8 months down that awful path,I’m still a non believer.
Everyday my thoughts get strong,
And one becomes a dreamer,
But the dreams don’t do what I want them to do,
"My love"I just can’t see her.
The path I take to help in grief just gets a little steeper.
If life does not improve from now,
My answer is to meet her.
My partner and I would never prepared,
For what the specialist doctor said,
We hoped the chemo worked but dread,
To tell you that the cancer spread.
Our palative nurse tried to dull the pain,
But time after time it was bad news again.
I just had enough of the pain being raw,
My impulse was to punch the sitting room door.
I need some space to Digest bad news,
My love of my life I was soon to loose.
How do you deal with such a dilemma,
Love for Cheryl will last for ever and ever.
What is my purpose,
What is my dream,
Is life meant to hurt us,
Why is my life so mean.
Life is a test,
Life is a mission,
Life has no rest,
When you’ve lost your ambition.
Life is 10 years in a HMP prison,
Life is too long when I loved one is missing.
Life can have hurt,
Life can be pain,
Life ain’t asset,
Life is to blame.
My life is on hold,
My life is on ice,
My life so I’m told,
Is a roll of a dice.
Life can be fixed,
Turn your Fortunes around,
You’ve lost your true love,
Happy memories youve found.
Dear Vonde, oh im so sorry for your loss, and im sorry you had to see your loved one terminally ill, My grandad had lung cancer in 2000 and i had to see him deteriorate it was months i would go to every hospital appointment do his cooking cleaning and other chores.
I also have grief councilling and now i write a diary of what i would tell my nan about. it helps my nan was more like my mum to me and my brother growing up we had some lovely memories of nan and grandad.
writing poems is a great idea and the one you sent was really lovely.
my sleel pattern is all over the place i get off to sleep but wake during the night sweating and having bad dreams always usually lost somewhere in my dream.
im always here if you would like to chat again im so so sorry for your loss its very recent like my nan she passed 6months ago sept 22.
take care and keep going with the poems
Hi so sorry to read what you are going through i understand how you feel i lost my husband to cancer 4 months ago he to thought the chemo was working it stayed stable for a while and then was told it had spread and there was nothing they could do he was told he only had six months left it was hard watching him go from being able to do things he enjoyed to being unable to nothing for him self . my heart goes out to you i am always here if you need to talk
hiya, aww bless yes i find that too when i have an afternoon nap i wake up cold and grotty too. im going to my local lake about 20 mins walk and im gonna scatter some of my nans ashes as the sun is shining and its my favourite place where i live hope your headache goes soon
Bless your heart. I can feel your pain from your words. Sending you a big enveloping hug xx