Lolla 49,
Just read your post again Lolla.
Did you get any support from anyone today? What /why did you clean microwaves for ? Did someone ask you to do that? Are you a teacher?
Surely to God you should have had better support today and even be sent home in the state you were in.
Take some time off. If not when does school break up for Easter ?
Am here for you
Deborah x
Thank you I do love my job xxx
Hi seychelles
No not much support today it was crap start stayed in kitchen then I cleaned the microwave because I was angry no I’m not a teacher just a T A in class then Went back in class to do a focus math and English lesson so no not much support today. Sometimes thats a school life lost in all the madness .
Hi mom
It’s going to be another wild ride for children to wear their own clothes then off time table this afternoon for comic relief whole school games then last afterschool club making mother’s day flowers I will be glad when I get home tonight. Feel like I need a bottle of gin to-night 
Positive affirmation today I choose hope over fear.
Hi mom made it through the day time to put up my feet so here goes xxx
Hi mom
I am sitting here missing you so much the pain of not having you in my life is consistent reminder of our love xxx
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I am extremely tired it is so exhausted And now Ive got to go to work. Found yesterday so painful it was just everywhere on the radio in the car pinging on my phone in the shops. I did make time for my mom took flowers sat on a bench talked to her spent time thinking. But on a work side the baby chicks are coming today the children are going to be so excited 
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Hi mom
Feeling tired and low and just got no motivation feel like I want to curl up and just stay for a long time. I’ve got a headache today 
all I want is a hug 
Hi mom
I’ve been awake most of the night then when I did fall asleep woke up this morning in a panic attack feel really shit my hands are shaking no my whole body is shaking. Love you mom xxx
Hi mom
Sorry about yesterday feeling better today think I hit a speed bump and need to slow down dont think Im ready to run just yet. Love you mom
Hi Lolla49,
Glad you feel a little better.
Did the children love the baby chicks. I bet they did. I had some once in my class and that’s all the children wanted to do was watch them all day long. I also had a butterfly kit and the children could see them hatching from a tiny egg. They loved them
Deborah x
Thank you the children have loved the chicks
Hi Lolla49,
No problem at all . I love reading your posts about the children as I miss my class so much now that I am retired. Your mum would be so proud of you carrying on with the children each day but also posting to her to tell her about your day.
Hope you are feeling a little better today
Deborah x
Hi mom
Children are going to hold the chick today and have a photograph for their Easter card didn’t sleep much last night things that were said in therapy keep popping in my mind then I keep replaying it over and over in my mind. I will have plenty of rest at the weekend as saturday and sunday Im on my own.
Hi mom
My partner and daughter are going away overnight so it’s just me and the dog till Sunday evening. The children did well yesterday holding the chicks only three children didn’t want to hold the chick so they held my hand holding the chick.
Hi mom
I’ve had a panic attack yesterday but I had a friend on hand to lend an ear. My Councillor has opened my eyes to a few things about my unhealthy relationship… how have I let this happen. Love you mom xxx
Hi mom
Got up late and now Im rushing in s bit of a flap. It will be fine breathe.
Hi mom
Had a chat with my boss today feeling a bit better and getting it off my chest. Science day tomorrow of timetable lots of experiments. Will we enjoy it … yes
Hi Lolla49,
Just want to say I love reading your posts to your mum. Have a lovely science day tom
Deborah x