Thank you Tilly13…it’s like a rollercoaster ride….I never liked them either. It’s crazy how this grief gets you. Take care and tomorrow May be better in some small way for us all xx
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I know somethings as he left his computer left open and i had 48 hours before he was found trying to find answers and police forensics asking questions, part of me is wanting to do a timeline of things he searched/ what I didn’t know, to try and work out how his mind got to the state it did, Im also thinking of asking for his GP reports and his CBT from local health authority , see what was missed.
I done that i requested medical files the ambulance notes from the night he was found…i didnt realise how bad his mental health was! He was begging for help and no help given he didnt tell me the half of it…started self medicating to get away from his psychosis…i no its not for everyone but the notes helped me a bit xx
I have kept on re reading all the bundle from the coroner and have pieced lots of it together. The help my son turned down breaks me. I was always there for him and if I’m really honest I couldn’t have done anymore. Totally heartbroken and I will never be the same again. I don’t want to see anyone again, other people just annoy me and haven’t a clue of what I feel. Xx
I think if he had asked for help and still struggled i will find it better but i dont think he did he kept saying my degree has taught me the GP can not help