Hello Jaydel,
I don’t know how long ago your partner died but I hope you can hang in there and that music will come back to you eventually as that is what happened to me.
Like you, my husband and I had a life filled with music, we liked a diverse range of music and a lot of our jokes involved singing lines of songs at each other or other music related jokes. Since an early age music has been super important to me as my Dad loved music too. My identity as a teenager was all around my love of metal/gothic music at the time… i’d never had a day where i hadnt listened or sang music but when my husband died I also couldn’t feel any music anymore. I remember when I had to choose the funeral music (3 songs) it took me a full day and it felt so weird to listen to music again as I hadn’t done until then. I am not sure how long it took but there did come a day some time later where i felt i could try again with music and then it became a very signifiicant thing in helping me claw my way back to the life i am now starting to make for myself after 9 months, At first i listened to songs that made me feel close to my husband, even ones i didnt necessarily like but he did… now i started to listen to my music and also new music… it feels like my music taste also doesnt know what it is doing just like the rest of me but the emotional comfort of music is definitely helping and i am glad i got it back.
Take care of yourself, take it minute by minute and i will be hoping there will come a point where you can listen to music again. I am sorry you are going through this… it is just horrible…
p.s… there is a good thread on this forum called “songs” if you use the search function… whenever you feel up to giving it a try x
I tried to put in a link but not sure if it works for you https://community.sueryder.org/t/songs/25194